"Death walks among us, you know," my crazy aunt once said. At the time, I think I smiled and edged away from her, reaching for anybody remotely sane. How wrong I was.
I'm not saying that I should have listened to that particular aunt, because, well, she's in an asylum now and let's just say that it was her, ah, obsession of death that led her there. No, I should have listened to the message concealed within her words, no less serious because of the nutter that delivered it to me for the first time.
Death walks among us, you know. My mother thought this, I realize. She died before I was born, but she left behind a name for me. I am called Mortician. Yes, not Mortitia, Mort, Morty, Morticia, or any other name in between. My name is Mortician. Thanks, mom. I prefer Mort, by the way, if you simply must call me by my name.
Death does walk among us. Is that an ominous message, or a reassurance? In translation, is that a good thing or a bad thing? Well, let's see. It depends on the kind of death, doesn't it?
Death walks among us, you know.
Padded walls and bladder galls, witches, frogs, and golden balls. Listen! It is Death that calls.
Am I crazy, do you think? Wow, this prologue has been steadily deteriorating since I started it. Deteriorating like a corpse left in the sun too long. Embalming fluid on a cracker! Stop it, Mort! You're embarrassing yourself! Even if your name is Mortician, you don't need to have an unhealthy preoccupation with death!
You don't need to talk to yourself, either. And yet... What is this? Oh right, I'm talking to you guys. Are you real? Am I real? Oh my god, I'm not real! I'm dead, aren't I? Or am I just a figment of somebody's imagination?
Fourth wall? What's that? Is it that rubble lying over in the corner?
Let's start over. I'm Mortician, but you should call me Mort, or you'll be mort. Yep. That was awful. Let me try one more time.
What do you call a dead body that...
...
...
I give up. Figure it out without a prologue.
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Death
FantasyMortician hates her name, loves her father, misses her mother, and is obsessed with the idea of death. Then again, who wouldn't be, with the relationship with death that comes from having such a name? She has one good friend, a girl with a name that...
