YES THE STORY IS DIFFERENT TO THIS YOU BUMBLE KLOOT BUT I WANTED TO MAKE A LITTLE BIT OF A STORY OUT OF THIS.
"You open for opinions atm?" My fingers shook and typed over the dim lit screen of my phone. It was late. For some reason I was anxious like I always was at that time of night.
When I got a reply I was surprised to say the least but smiled warmly at my screen.
"All the time!" Some how what could have been an awkward interaction was... easy. Normal.
"Yay thank you :)" I cringed, nervous somehow. What if she disagreed?
Ellie it's your opinion who the fuck cares? My mind kept repeating but some how after stalking the account for a short while I wanted to make a good impression, this person was not here to fuck around and they seemed the heart breaking kind of amazing.
As I typed out the long paragraph, that was my opinion on Dan and Phil, I was satisfied. What if she blocks you? My anxiety had always been an issue it always acted up at the worst of times, mainly when it was dark and I couldn't control it.
Send.
I couldn't read the screen, my hands wouldn't stop shaking. The warm metal cupped in my hands began to slip out. As I dropped it, I stared into the empty space of my hands and took the time to breathe.
A minute later I typed out another small sentence apologising.
Damn
Spill that tea
I agree completely with this!
My heart rate slowed, reading this.
I waited for a while to see if it went up, it didn't. I fell asleep.
5 days later I tried to speak to her, she spoke so easily to me, I could almost hear the click when we started talking.
Her name was Alice. My mind went to Alice in wonderland, I didn't know then that she'd give me the same sense of wonder that the movie had given me.
Try me.
I had to try a new friend, plus this one seemed so... different... committed. There was no harm no foul with her. She was blunt and I fucking loved that.
Within a couple of good days talking to her, the anxiety that had pushed my into an endless catacomb of fear had somehow been pushed away by her. Could I ask Alice to be my friend yet? Surely.
Send.
Shit! What the hell am I doing! She's going to hate me. She'll think I'm too forward and weird.
Aww, you're my friend too.
Not quite believing my eyes, I read it over a couple of times. Alice wanted to be my friend? No one ever wants to be my friend.
I quickly wanted to discover more about her, what did she like? Movies, TV shows, Youtubers!! I had to know it all.
When I found that she had almost the exact same interests I almost died. She was probably the most perfect person ever.
Being the nervous twat I was, I managed to write out the same message 3 times before I finally thought it was right. Right for her eyes.
Little did k know that 1 year later I'd still be talking to the same hoe, who taught me Dutch swear words, drama and be telling each other kinks and so many other things.
Little did I know that she'd change my life. Little did I know that she'd keep me from the darkest corner from my mind and help me breathe when the world was trying to collapse my lungs.
She saved me. She changed me.
She's my best friend. She's the best person I've ever had the honour of talking to.
She's the Dan to my Phil, only were dorkier and dirtier because we're amazing.
We're true, we're colourful, we're bluesy, we're kloots, we're fucktrucks, we're bumble bee's.
We're puzzle pieces and I have never been more honoured to fit with someone than this gorgeous girl THAG I never knew I needed.
So Alice... Thank you for 1 year. Thank you for the endless hours. You have truly changed my life. And I can never thank you enough.
