TW for Cancer and Amputation
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The inevitable happens.
Dan's relapsed. And it's bad.
His doctor says that the best way to cure it is amputation, as it only going to keep coming back.
So he sets up the date for his surgery. Two weeks from that Wednesday.
He considers procrastinating his own life-saving surgery, because honestly, it's so scary.
And he's trying to hide it, but Phil can tell. And he forces it out of Dan.
It's just that-he's so fucking tired. He's still so fucking tired. Dan doesn't understand, everything was going right for him, and then the cancer. And after that, it became okay again. In fact, it became great. But then this happened, and they had to drop everything.
And her name-her name was Lily. She was five, but she was so beautiful.
Golden hair, sapphire eyes. They were just getting to the point where they could actually adopt her.
But then he was diagnosed with cancer again and everything went to all sorts of shit.
Dan is heartbroken. Because all he really wants is to be a father.
And so does Phil.
Before they know it, they're both a mess.
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With the day of his surgery rapidly approaching, Dan decides he's going to try running.
Sure, it hurts like hell, but he does it.
They start living. Actually living.
Because Dan's going to have a very visible handicap, and Phil wants to make sure he does everything Dan wants to do.
They try to go biking, they take train rides, they even took a small (emphasis on small) hike.
They're both heartbroken that things like this had to happen, but maybe-maybe it is for a reason.
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They day before the surgery, he finally tells the fans. They're all sorts of worried for him. Comments start pouring in.
The great thing about his fanbase is the support. And through his awful ~journeys~ with cancer, he's gained support from his community. Survivors, patients, and family members of them both. Even perfectly healthy people.
It makes getting his leg cut off slightly
more tolerable.
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The night before the surgery is the worst.
Dan can't sleep, and he feels like he may puke.
He showered for the last time that night, feeling the way the warm water fell in small droplets on to his feet.
Suddenly, Dan is taken aback to Monday 19 October 2009.
He remembers everything. His outfit. He remembers combing his hair to make it look nice. The awful teenager cologne he wore, the one he actually still wore. Dan remembers bouncing his leg sitting on the train. He remembers meeting Phil, and looking into his eyes. His beautiful blue eyes. The rest, the rest he remembers vividly.
YOU ARE READING
We'll Carry On//Phan
FanfictionThey were living a great life. Two men in their twenties with successful YouTube careers and a giant fanbase. But when Dan's life-changing diagnosis hits them hard, everything changes. The saga follows coping, love, loss, how each of our lives are t...
