Ephemeral | A Lily & James Story

Goodbyes

      The rest of April and all of May pass in blurs of heat and studying. The coursework to make sure all of us seventh years are prepared for N.E.W.T.S. is overwhelming. All of the teachers seem to think that their subject is the most important, so they give stacks of homework, crippling their students.

     "Sirius, what year did the Soap Blizzard occur?" I ask over lunch, frantically scanning all of my notes.

     "So, tired," Sirius whines. "I don't even care about History of Magic, what do I care if I pass that N.E.W.T.?"

     "1378," Remus answers for him, searching through his own notes.

     Sirius turns to glare at his best friend. "Know it all," he mutters.

     Three hours later, I walk hand and hand with James from the classroom. "We're done?" I ask in disbelief, a peculiar feeling swirling in my abdomen.

      "We are," James says grinning.

      "Thank Merlin!" Sirius exclaim, wrapping his arm around Marlene, whom swats him away. Sirius winks at her; she gives him the finger. Good to know they'll never change.  

      "How can we be done?" I ask, looking back at the classroom, feeling an urge to walk back through the doors and sit down, proclaiming there is noway I can be done.

      "Lils?" Remus prods. "What's wrong?"

      "We're never coming back," I say, surprised when tears sting my eyes. 

      "It's okay, Lily," James wraps his arm around me. "We still have a week until we graduate."

      And I swear, that week passed faster than any other week I spent at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It seems like I blink, and all of a sudden I'm sitting wedged between Marlene and James in the first row of chairs by the lake at our graduation. Funnily enough, we don't have to sit alphabetically like muggles do. We aren't getting a diploma; it's just a ceremony.

      "Now," Professor Dumbledore says. "We will hear from our Head Girl, Miss Lily Evans."

      James claps so loud it hurts my ears, and I hear someone whistling and without looking I know it's Sirius. I take a deep breath and take my place on stage looking out at the crowd of people. Students and teachers and parents. I feel a pang in my chest, saddened that my parents aren't here to see me graduate. I take another deep breath and begin.

       "I wrote this speech about a thousand times because I didn't know what I wanted to say or what I wanted my message to convey. After going over it again and again, I landed on- change is inevitable. As a person who hates change, I can honestly say it can be a good thing...sometimes. For example, I am muggle born. If you had told me ten years ago, that I would be graduating from a magic school at eighteen years old, I would have told you you were a crazy person." The crowd chuckles.

      "However, I got my letter at age eleven, and I have never been happier. Being introduced into this world, my world, has taught me to embrace change. In these past seven years, so many things have happened. I've learned to brew potions. I've lost friends. I've become a prefect and eventually Head Girl. But what's crazy is looking back at this year at all of the ways my life has changed in less than three hundred and sixty-five days. I've fallen in love. I've been kidnapped and tortured. I lost my parents. I've witnessed pain and hurt, but I've also experienced happiness in its purest form. I've laughed with friends and broken rules- yes, I can admit to that now, Professor McGonagall, you can't do anything to me now."

      I take a deep breath scanning all of the laughing faces, even McGonagall herself. "Change is inevitable. It may not always be good, but that's life. We may always want things to stay the change for fear of discomfort or forgetting, but life goes on. Books end. Leaves fall. Children grow. It's the sad cycle of life, but that's what makes life so special and so fleeting. Change doesn't have to be a bad thing, and goodbyes don't have to be forever. Hopefully, I live a long life and can look back on all the changes in my life, and I can know that I faced life with love and happiness and strength. That I said goodbye when needed, and I embraced change with a humble attitude. Thank you."