dear jiyun » jhs

/25/

160706

dear jiyun,

I am here again
with my white papers
and black pen

trying for my best
handwriting

and getting my thoughts
in order.

it's been a few days
and I've received
no letter in return

or request to stop

no sign that you care
to even tell
me to quit
trying

and you know
being ignored

absolutely unimportant

unworthy to be shown
the slightest
reaction

hurts more than a
harsh confession

or a cold,
verbal slap in the face,

an immediate answer
whatever,

something,

and you gave me both
the hurt
of a rejection
and the pain
of absence,
emptiness.

so it rattles my lungs

and puts me into
immense thinking

how you don't seem
to give a fuck about what I do

anymore,

if I sent you
30 letters
all the thirty letters that
I'm going to,

will you care
enough to read them?

will you care
enough to tear them apart?

will you care
enough to feed my feelings
to the dogs