Her demolishing

Three

I walked into school the next day with blue jeans and a plain sweater. I couldn't act like a victim. I needed to act strong. I am strong. I kept my head held high even when I passed Tyler. I faltered when he winked at me.

I was proud I kept walking. Shannon stood at my locker. I stopped dead in my tracks. She knew what happened I told her but she didn't believe me. No one will. I turned on my heel. "Raven!" She yelled. "fuck off Shannon" I spat keeping my voice cold and void from any sign of weakness.

She topped she always gave up so quickly. That's why I won most arguments. I waited till she left my hall to go to my locker. My facade of being okay. Was falling down. Tyler took a brick from the bottom row when he winked at me.

Shannon took one when she didn't believe me. My parents took one when they didn't notice I wasn't fine. My teachers took multiple when they didn't realize I was in fact not paying attention for any reason besides boredom. The sadness sunk it's venomous claws deep inside me.

Latching onto my whole body. Sadness in my view is in fact a disease far worse than the others. It plagues everyone from time to time. Some for longer than they deserve. It morphs people's visions of themselves and reality. That to me is far worse than any pain.

As I walked to class I stared at the girls standing with their group of friends while she tried to get a word in and they ignored. I looked at the skinnier jock getting pushed around and laughed at. I looked at the Barbie with brown hair and brown eyes being pushed aside by the blonde haired and blued eyed ones.

I began to realize everyone was sad in their own way. There's no such thing as a happy person. Happiness is overrated. Look at what's trending right now. Being grunge and punk. None of those require happiness. They both require a certain sad vibe.

I sat in social class staring at the floor. The sadness had sunk deeper. And rattled me to my very core. How can people not notice you aren't alive you are just breathing. I notice when people are upset. Why can't people notice when I am?