You'll Just Know

Chapter 17

            I’m proud to say that it didn’t take me long to adjust to life at Joelester High. In a few short weeks, I had fallen into a comfortable daily routine that I grew to enjoy very much. Each day, I would have lunch with Emily and her clique, and although I never felt wholly comfortable there, it never was as uncomfortable as that first day, either. My classes weren’t so bad once I got to know a few more people, and I even learned a few shortcuts through the maze of hallways.

Then, every afternoon after school, while Emily was in cheerleading practice, I would walk home with Wendy and we would inevitably take a long detour on the way. We spent countless hours in the quiet sanctuary of the library, walking in the stillness of the cemetery, or sitting on the bank of the Witchahee as the river slid peacefully by. It was always my favorite part of the day, sometimes lasting well into the evening. We would have comfortable, lengthy conversations as we wandered the outskirts of Devon. We talked truthfully and freely about anything and everything, and our friendship grew stronger than ever.

            Then, some nights, I would meet Emily and we would go to dinner or a movie. The nightlife in the tiny town of Devon was deceptively lively. There was rarely a night that every seat in the old movie theater didn’t sell out or that The Trolley wasn’t packed to overflowing. Other nights, Emily and I would drive to the mall, which proved to be another popular teen hangout. Then there were the nights that we would just go someplace and park in Emily’s little Honda. On those nights especially, it was easy to lose track of time, and a fierce dispute began at home about exactly what time I was supposed to be back on a school night. Those were some rocky times between my parents and I.

            Almost imperceptibly, the days began to shorten as summer waned. The leaves began to speckle with bright color, and soon the cool wind was combing handfuls from the trees and sending them spiraling to the ground. When the first truly cold days began to set in, I suppose it took me off guard. The summer was gone now, and I was amazed at how quickly it had passed.

            The season’s change brought several changes to my life, as well. It was around that time, I remember, that Emily began enthusiastically talking about the Homecoming Dance. In Hackensack, I had always avoided those kinds of social activities. It seemed to me that they catered much more to the elite social cliques. Perhaps that was the reason they were all so important to Emily.

            At that time, Emily was especially obsessed with the idea of becoming Homecoming Queen. Apparently, it had been a longtime dream of hers and in the weeks before the dance it became the central topic of many of our conversations.         She seemed to think about it constantly. Although the whole idea held no interest to me whatsoever, I did my best to be supportive and understanding of her fixation...

            “I guess I’m just finding it hard to understand your preoccupation with the whole thing.” I said one evening.

            I was in Emily’s room, sitting on her unmade bed while she changed in the adjoining bathroom. We had just returned from the mall and she was trying on a new outfit she had bought. The room around me was a mess. There were papers, cassette tapes, and shoes strewn all over the floor. There were no clothes in that mess, though. Emily took meticulous care of her clothes.

            Every inch of wall space was covered with posters and clippings from magazines. Put all together, the room had a carefully designed air of chaos. Although it made me feel a bit claustrophobic, Emily seemed very comfortable in it.

            “What don’t you understand?” Emily called back to me as she changed. She had left the door slightly ajar so we could talk.