The Doorman

1

Dana

I'm on the computer. I'm off the computer. I'm looking for a job. I'm playing computer games. What the hell is wrong with me?

I can't concentrate. I'm 22, I finished college, and now I'm jobless. I live in a building my uncle owns for free. I am so done right now. My apartment is too small to concentrate and its stinky because the window outside faces exactly at the dumpster.

My bed is on the left corner when you walk in. There's a door to a bathroom that barely fits my leg on your right. At the far right corner is a small kitchen with a really small microwave, and at the far left corner is a small table next to a fireplace for the winter. I really got to move out of here. I sit on the table and put my head right back into the computer.

I search up the Detroit online newspaper and see if they have any job opportunities anywhere. I'm desperate. I scroll to the last page and start reading

Laundry mat cleaner, no.
Nursery home clothing, what the hell is that?
Detroit town hall greeter, nope.

I scroll down and this page catches my eye.

Have you ever wanted to live in the city that never sleeps? Do you want to have one of the best paying jobs in America? If you call this number, 646-555-674, you could be New York's most important worker! This jobs responsibility is to read over and edit the New York Times newspaper. You will be informed later of what this means. Please, call before someone else does!

Wow. The New York Times. I could be working for that.

No Dana, no. You didn't pass English in your first year of high school and your last year of college.

But maybe I can apply, just for the hell of it? I'll sleep on it. Nobody reads the newspaper anyway.

•••••••••••••

The next morning was brutal. I woke up with a huge headache and I forgot almost everything about yesterday. I get out of bed and walk across the room to the table where my computer is. I turn it on and the Detroit newspaper pops up.

Oh yeah, I was looking for work...

I look at the newspaper and see what's highlighted. New York Times... I find my phone and dial the number.

*ring*
*ring*
*ring*
"Hello, welcome to New York Times. This is an automated introduction. If you would like to hear today's major news, press 1. If you would like to talk about the paper, press 2. If you would like to apply for a job, press 3."

I immediately press 3.

"Please wait until one of our guides answer your call. Thank you for calling New York Times." It rings another 3 times and then I hear a click.

"Hello, this is Jamie, accountant and co-manager of employment. How may I help you?"
"Hi Jamie. I'm Dana. I recently read yesterday's paper and saw a job opportunity for the reading and editing? Is that correct?" I ask.
"Yes Dana. You are the 11th caller. If you send in a résumé, we will be able to choose who fits in best. The directions are on the back of the page. If you are reading online, there is a link on the bottom of the page with the information. It will take you to all you need to do," she says.
"Oh okay, thank you," I say.
"It's nothing. Have a great day!" She greets.
"You too," I say and hang up.

For the rest of the day, I wrote a 4 page résumé on my experiences, my GPA's, my grades, the schools I went to, and so much more.

•••••••••••

It's been 4 days and I don't know what I am waiting for. Two days ago I got a text that I am in the last 2 people and they will need a few days to balance it. I recently got a call and I have a voicemail. I'm afraid to open it up.

Eh, fuck it.

"Hello Dana. This is Denis Joseph Parlo. I have some news... You got the job! We compared your résumé with others and we couldn't leave the offer in the files. You had amazing grades, amazing opportunities from the past, and some other newspapers got a hold of your résumé and I fought for you. Anyway, you start next week. We paid for your plane ticket to New York, you have a number of apartment buildings to choose from and we pay your rent for the first 4 years. Unfortunately, you have to pay for parking over night. Thank you for your time. I'll look forward to meeting you. All other information is in the email you provided for us in your résumé. Enjoy!"

••••••••