Chapter One- The Way We Used To Be

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Dedicated to my best friend Alexa who has always been there for me through everything and anything. She's always has something to say that'll cheer me up. She finally now has a wattpad account so I can dedicate this to her.  Love ya Alexa! Enjoy my book, Three Words, Eight Letters....

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You know that feeling? Where there's a constant hole, something missing, emptiness in the pit of your stomach? That's honestly all I've seemed to have ever felt.

Love is a monster, a monster that constantly grows stronger and stronger. When it is true love, it never dies. If you love a person, I mean actually love them, not that fake stuff people talk about all the time, there is no way for you to ever fall out of love. That's what has constantly been running through my jumbled up mind lately. Everything seems to be a riddle, a riddle that I can't seem to decode. Loving someone who doesn't love you back is a constant struggle.

I, Violet Underwood, am in love with my best friend Jake Faye.

I didn't always know that I was in love with my best friend, it was just one of those things that seemed to be forbidden, never to happen. Well, that was the case until Jake asked out Erica Smith. A pang of jealously flooded through my chest; it wasn't possible. I couldn't be jealous of my best friend asking out a girl; I was a friend only a friend and that's all I wanted to be. What was this terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach and the ache in my heart that made me want to curl up in a ball and cry?

I was able to convince myself this for a fairly long time that I wasn't in love with him, but each day it became harder and harder to bare; my jealousy becoming stronger and more overpowering than it had ever become before.

I am only human; a girl can only take so much pain until one day she's going to make a decision; she's going to break eventually.

We were both twelve when we made our childish pact that promised that no matter what we would take each other to prom. No matter what. We both believed that it was the best way to have fun; to go with someone whom you would always have fun with and whom you would always care about. Sure, we were only twelve when we promised each other this, but it gradually began to matter more and more to me.

Whenever our eyes locked or whenever he flashed me a smile it was unbearable.

Jake asked Erica to go with him to prom; forgetting our childish pact. My heart crumbled into a million pieces; my best friend had let me down. Erica now towered over little old me; the second option. He probably doesn't even remembered our little promise, but I for sure do. It may have just been a comment he made; meant to be forgotten the next day. That's not what it had meant to me; it meant everything; it meant I had somewhat of a chance with my best friend.

I couldn't keep living my life that way. Why should I have to live every second of my life with tears coating my eyes and pain constantly invading my fragile heart? It's not fair to me. It's not at all fair for me to have to suffer like this, it isn't right.

I began making lists of possible solutions, but there was only one idea that kept creeping back to me. It would be difficult, but it would be the only way to stop the pain; end it all. It would be worth it in the end. Right?

Prom was the day that would mark the beginning of the end of my friendship with Jake. I stopped talking to him. I never responded to his texts or answered his calls anymore. I would constantly avoid making eye contact with him in the halls, quickly walking by him, afraid I would have to explain my odd behavior to him.

For the first time ever, Jake and I were indeed separable. We all know those people that seem to never be apart from each other. They're always having more fun and laughing more than they should be. That's how my friendship was with Jake. Jake was the kind of person you could trust with your darkest secrets. Unless, of course your darkest secret happens to be like mine, being in love with my best friend. Never would I ever tell him that. It would make things awkward and our friendship would never be the same. That's just not the sort of thing I was willing to risk.

That night, for lack of words, was a disastrous night. Jake's night was full of laughs and smiles, while mine was spent in the hallway with my friend Peyton talking to me in between my sobs. Peyton was my girl best friend. She was there for me more than Jake was and she always knew exactly how to make me feel better. She of course knew that I was in love with Jake, but she was the only one. Peyton was the only other person I could trust with such a threatening secret.

Jake never even noticed me that night. His entire night revolved around Erica and no one else, including me.

Of course Peyton told me that any guy, even my best friend, that didn't make me feel infinite and just crushed my self-esteem, would never be worth it. Somehow, it didn't matter to me, I loved him. I loved him more than anyone I have ever loved before.

Now how about I take you to the start of my new beginning. It only happened because I had to go to the mall to pick up a birthday present before my friend's party. So much more happened during that trip than a simple credit card transaction.

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Hey fellow wattpadians!!:) So here is chapter one of my new short story! I have it all planned out and have to have it all written by November 6th. Why you might ask! Wellll I'm going to enter it into the wattyawards! Originally I wanted to enter my book In A Heart Beat, but I soon realized that with my busy schedule there would be no way I'd have it all written in time. So here is a short story for you! Wish me luck in completing it on time and don't forget to vote!!:) Oh and after this chapter the chapters will get much much longer! Have a great day:)

~Keeks02

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