Wide Awake

Chapter 18 Talking

Jake helps Ellie in the truck and then goes around to get in. They get on the road and Ellie turns the radio down where it's barely discernible.
Jake knows this is going to be something big he knows it has to do with them and it scares him. He loves her but he is so scared to tell her.
Ellie said," I have so many emotions and thoughts running through my head Jake. I'm not sure where to start. Last night and today watching you with Pearl was amazing. They always say that how a man treats his children and his mom is a great indicator of what kind of person they are and how they will treat a lady. Your indicator is off the charts. I know I may be rambling and it's because I'm so nervous and scared. The feelings I have are so strong they scare me. I wonder what you see in me. You were married to a freaking model and I am a total nerd college student. I wonder if I'm just fooling myself with you. Like I'm gonna wake up and you are gonna not be real.
      I was missing my dad really bad because I could always talk to him and he would listen and let me sort out what I wanted to say or how I felt about something and Pop has stepped into that roll. Talking with him, I realized something, I realized that, why is this so hard ? Why can't I just tell you?
   Jake pulls over on the side of the interstate and said," Come here Ellie and let me hold you. Whatever it is you don't have to tell me today. Tell me whenever you want to. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere okay baby. Just relax sweetheart. As far as what I see in you, you are beautiful and kind and great with my family and my little girl. I can see it's genuine and not an act. You light up a room with your smile. Yeah I married a model and how did that turn out for me? Not real good at all."
   Ellie said," You don't understand, sometimes our future changes quickly and completely and we're left with only the choice of what to do next. We can choose to be afraid of it, to stand there trembling, not moving, assuming the worst can happen, or we can step forward into the unknown and assume it will be brilliant.  I want to choose stepping into the unknown which isn't like me but you have done that for me Jake. You make me want to forget listing the pros and cons of us , you make me want to see what the brilliant is going to be like, you have made me fall for you , head over heels, I have fallen. Pop and momma reminded me that we aren't promised tomorrow Jake. We need to make sure that the ones we love know we love them, every day. I said all of that to say this Jake, I love you! I know it's quick and soon and you don't have to say anything back....."
Jake cuts her off with a kiss that says everything he wants to say and everything she has been trying to say to him.
    Jake pulls back and says," I love you Ellie, I just didn't want to lose you by saying it too soon. Momma and Lacey told me about the same thing , that I needed to tell you. I am head over heels in love with you Ellie."
        Ellie smiled, I'm in love with you to Jake " and she kisses him with everything she feels. He pulls back and said," Baby we gotta stop , 1 cause we need to get on the road and 2 I just really love the feel of you in my arms a little too much and afraid to get carried away"
     Ellie smiles," Getting carried away with you sounds like it would be amazing."
    Jake looked at her," Ellie, you know I would love to get carried away with you and make love to you and show you just how precious you are to me. But I know that is something that you are waiting to do, so I won't push you. I'm not ready for marriage yet Ellie, I know I love you and I see us together for a long time maybe forever but I can't promise you marriage right now. "
      Ellie said, "I'm not asking for marriage Jake, I'm asking you to love me to let me love you. Pop always asks the hard questions that make me realize what I am having trouble with even when I don't realize it. Talking with him this morning made me think how I love you and you are who I want to be with. I admit I'm scared senseless butJake I want us to take this further. I want us to make love, momma reminded me that my heart would let me know when it was right and I may regret it sometime down the road but I don't think so. I trust you with my heart, it's yours Jake. "
   Jake said," Ellie you need to be sure baby cause there is no going back once you cross that line. I love you and I'm okay with waiting. Yeah it's tough but nothing worth having is easy. I would wait forever for you Ellie! You are that special."
   Ellie kisses Jake and he groans and pulls back. "I promise you Ellie that it will be special and something you will always remember. But it's not gonna be in a truck or the bus. I don't know when just yet but I will promise you that baby." Jake said as he signals and pulls back on the road. He puts his arm around Ellie and she lays her head in his shoulder.

She gets her phone and posts one of the pictures of her with Jake and Pearl today on the boat with the caption. Nothing like spending the day on the water with these 2 cuties! #funinthesun
In a few minutes she got a text

Pops🎤🎸: Hey baby girl, you look happy in that picture. Are you feeling better?

Ellie: I am happy Pop! I do feel better but you are in trouble, you stopped an interview this morning to talk to me. I asked if you were busy.😡

Pops🎤🎸: Like I told you I will never be to busy to talk to you or your brother or sister. No matter what is going on. Family first baby girl! Now have you talked to Jake?

Ellie: Yeah we are driving and we had a chance to talk. I told him I loved him and that I was in love with him. He shut me up with a kiss when I started to tell him that he didn't have to say it back. Thank you Pop!! I love you more than you know. I also told him I wanted him to be the one and I think it freaked him out a little😂 But he told me it wouldn't be in the truck or on the bus he didn't know when but he would make sure it was a special as I am. It made me feel so great to hear that.

Pops 🎤🎸: Baby girl, I love you as much as I would love my own child. I feel like you are mine. He better make it special for you cause he's one lucky son bitch and he better realize it. If he doesn't  treat you like the princess you are then he will answer to me.

Ellie: Thanks Pop but I think he can handle it. Is it weird that we talk about this stuff?

Pops🎤🎸: Probably to some it is weird but our family has such an open communication and always have had thanks to your mom and dad. I just wanted to make sure you are okay. Tell Jake to text me when he has some time to talk . Love you baby girl!

Ellie: I will tell him. I love you to Pop!

"Jake, Pop said for you to text him when you get a chance." Ellie told Jake

Jake said," know what he wants?"
Ellie replies," no he didn't say just said for you to text him when you had time to talk."

They arrive at the venue and it is 3am. They get on the bus and they both head straight to bed cause they are tired.