BlurryFace (Joshler 1/3)

Seven||T h e J u d g e

TRIGGER: SELF-HARM (sort of), FIGHTING, etc, please be safe guys there's a paragraph where Blurryface is telling Tyler to self harm I'll put a *** Above just in case anyone is triggered easily by it!!

    "What's that?" Asked Josh, leaning over my shoulder as he looked at my notebook. I shrugged, looking down at the words I had wrote on the piece of paper. "Lyrics I guess...I don't know." He laughed, "They're good actually...when the leaders of the bad guys sang, something soft and soaked in pain?" I nodded, my cheeks heating up as he read the words out loud.

"I just kind of write whatever...metaphorically a lot." He nodded, "Yeah, you're creative." He smiled and sat down back at his seat.

He looked different in his school uniform, like he didn't belong. Well, he was an offstate did we ever look like we belonged? He looked more serious and broad, yet I knew him as being the unique fun guy he was.

This morning was terrible. My mom was more strict on me because of last night when they caught me sneaking in. She kept saying how she was worried sick and she doesn't know where I'm going. I kept reassuring her everything was fine but she didn't seem to believe me. Now I defiantly wouldn't ever be able to sneak to Josh's again or even ask to go over his or out.

"I got caught sneaking in last night." I muttered, leaning back in my seat to listen to Josh's reply. "Oh that sucks...what'd they do?" He asks, leaning forward now towards me. I studied his face for a moment, something i caught myself doing a lot. His big brown eyes were filled with concern and curiosity. His lips were slightly touching, just a tiny gap between them. His lips seemed so soft and pink. I tugged myself out of those thoughts and back up to his eyes, now deciding to answer what he had asked me.

"Eh...my dad yelled at me like usual...basic you're a failure Pep talk." I laughed, wanting to make sure everything was lighthearted, and that it was something I was fine with, Yet Josh wasn't laughing. His soft pink lips were now pressed together in a slight frown. His eyes now filled with sympathy, almost like he was stuck in thought as well. "And uh...they're way more strict on me now...so it'll be tough to come over this weekend...I'll try though...really." I filled in the silent spaces that Josh had left, trying to reassure him after what I said. "Oh...I'm sorry I got you in trouble." He suddenly said, his tone low.

I narrowed my eyebrows and shook my head. "No, no, josh it's not your fault at all." I said, now leaning closer to him as my expression changed. "Well...just try to come over this weekend. My brother won't be home so everything will be fine and okay." He said again, more quietly as he leaned back into his seat now slouching down farther. I watched as the happiness from his face leaked away into a sadness. A cold expression now was on his face. He began to scribble slightly at his paper as the teacher began to talk for today's lesson. I sighed and slouched back down into my seat, glancing back at him one last time before back to my paper of lyrics.

The bell rung, snapping me out of the deep thoughts I was in. I had almost forgotten that I was in class, so far into my thoughts. The one thought I couldn't get rid of was Josh. I created scenarios in my head of what it would be like if I could actually date Josh. I doubt it would ever happen since Josh probably didn't like me that way. Yet it was fun to fantasize. Was that creepy? I  never really went through this stuff. My thoughts were also a mix of Blurryface, his family, careers, future, etc. Always a mix of multiple things.

"Hey, let's go." Josh suddenly spoke. I glanced up as I saw Josh leaning on his desk with his books tucked tightly in his arms. I was stood up, grabbing my things slowly as I got stuck into thoughts. I sped up and followed him out of the room, dreading the walk through the hallway.