Raven Girl

Chapter 27

Regina woke screaming. She'd been having the same nightmare for a while now. It started off with the old nightmare, the nightmare of the White Lady. Regina wasn't sure how it had happened, but she'd invented her mother's murderer. Regina's mother, Elaine, had died when she was ten. Ever since, she'd woken in cold sweats, with a pale ghost-like figure in her mind. Every time, the ghost would kill her mother by slitting her throat, and Regina would be powerless to stop her – enclosed behind glass, sobbing and beating the wall with her fist. The glass never cracked. The grief washed over her anew, as sharp and crippling as it had been on the first day.

Then the dream changed.

Shrike hands, metal and sharp, reaching for her as she huddled in that dark cell. The cold bricks seeped water through her clothes and she tried to fight, to kick and bite and punch, but it was too late – they had her. Their fingers crushed her arms, breaking bone and shredding muscle, and she screamed but no one came to help. They leered and laughed at her, their faces promising acts of unspeakable violence. Regina cried for someone to save her, but she would be in the prison forever –

She gripped her arms. The bruises were real. They hadn't faded since the prison. She rocked back and forth, still tangled in her sleeping bag. Her chest had locked up; hair stuck to her with sweat. Her breath came out in a wheeze and her vision was spinning. She clenched her arms tighter. The bruises hurt. They hurt, and it was a real pain, not like the dream pain, because that wasn't real. It wasn't real. It wasn't real.

"It's because the memory is so fresh," Elias said, making her jump as he sat up. "It feels like it's only just happened. Don't worry. Everything, even scars, fade with time."

Regina couldn't muster the strength to reply. She realised that everyone was staring at her, even Kutkh and Ares. Of course they were. She'd just screamed her head off.

Regina began to shake, and raked fingers through her matted hair. "Oh, gods. They'll be looking for us and they'll have heard my scream."

"They're probably miles away," Nadine said, brushing dishevelled hair back from her face. "And we have a dragon to fight them off if they do come. They're not going to capture you again, Regina."

"Someone will. I'm Kostin's daughter. They'll want me. Oh, why did I come on this mission? I'm just putting you all in danger. I should have stayed in the Palace."

"And suffocated?" Gylfi said quietly. She looked at him, surprised he'd remembered their conversation about her situation, and their fathers.

Elias stood, stretched, and pulled a sack of porridge oats from their bags. He filled a pot with water and began to prepare their breakfast, while Regina went to the river to wash. She splashed her face, vowing never to sleep again and then realising how stupid that was. She scrubbed her hair until she was shivering and her scalp was numb, thinking of Elias's words. Scars fade with time.

"Having a crisis?" Nadine said. Regina looked up. The thief was sat on the stern of the Stormdanser, running her fingers along a shield with her legs swinging and kicking against the wood.

"No. Yes. I just – I'm just... scared."

"You would be."

"Don't act so mean. I'm sure you get scared, too. You're just more used to hiding your emotions than I am."

Nadine shrugged.

"I had to join you. At least I'm seeing the world now."

"Seeing it. More like letting it kill you. I'd rather stay trapped in a cage."

"I don't believe that."

"When we come back... if we come back... what will your father do?"

"I have no idea. Forbid me to leave the Palace again? It might be worse. I don't know."