Delivered From the Hands of Death

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"Paul Sectern, age 49," Ryan read off the moist, putrid wallet he just collected, "Sorry Paul."


Ryan shifted his weight on the tree. No position he found was comfortable. Incessant moaning worsened it by a factor of 100.

The minutes became hours in his mind. He didn't even know how many Plaguers there were. After counting 250, Ryan decided to stop. Of every escape strategy he thought threw, he was able to figure that there was no way he could escape with more than three appendages. He started to just shoot them, nothing better to do, He figured. But it was hopeless. He checked his ammo, one bullet. There wasn't much that one bullet can do, and there was still a lot of Plaguers. As he raised his gun to his temple, a rock hit him in the stomach with a note tied to it that read: Dumbass.

This stopped him. He untied the note and unfolded it. This is what he read:

Great job. You're smart. Are you from Harvard? How'd you manage to get caught in a tree. That's just ridiculous. Whatever, not important right now. Just look over the Zulus to your left. I'll throw up a two-way when you see me.

Ryan looked to his right, realized his mistake, and looked to his left. It took a bit of scanning but he found a crouching man staring straight at him, not making a sound. Upon being spotted the man threw up a walkie-talkie to Ryan. He then crouched back down behind a bush.

Ryan caught the walkie-talkie and spoke into it, "Okay, I got it."

"Great," the walkie-talkie responded, "I'm john, What's your name?"

"I'm-" Ryan started to say.

"Whatever, not important right now," John interrupted, "it looks like you up a creek without a paddle. And by that I mean up a tree without a shotgun."

"Yeah, but what can you do to help me?"

"Uh..." John paused," ... This!"

Before Ryan could ask what "this" was, John jumped up and shot a Plaguer right in the back of the head. All of the Plaguers around the tree turned around to face him. John backed up slowly and started screaming, "Hey, Zed heads! I got a little Johnny buffet waiting for ya! Come on, you want some of this meat?! Woo!"

He slowly led them away so Ryan could climb down. Ryan turned to run away only to run right smack into a tree. At least, it was big enough to be a tree. Ryan stood back up and looked straight into the chest of large, towering giant of a man. The man bent down to look Ryan in the eye and said, "If John don't live through this, neither will you. Now, come on. We got someone you need to meet."

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