The Trials of Being a Housecarl

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This is a Lydia x Male!Dragonborn one shot. Hopefully it is to your liking.
I still haven't seen a single request... I wonder why...
Also, I have nothing against Muiri.

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She watched from across the table as his eyes roamed over the book. His brow was pinched, his shoulders were hunched, and he'd been reading that damn journal for hours. She could tell he was worried. Again.

"Why don't you rest for a while, my thane." Lydia suggested. He merely grunted in response. "You need to sleep."

A few minutes pass before he opens his mouth to yawn. He tensed up tighter than before and buried his head in the book as if to show just how much he disliked the constant nagging.

"I'll sleep when I figure out where they're keeping her." His voice betrayed him, showing just how tired he was. He gripped his quill tighter. Lydia felt jealousy creep into her thoughts when he mentioned the damsel in distress, but she kept her feelings to herself.

"We'll get her back, but you need to take care of yourself... You've been at that journal for two days now. You've hardly slept, you barely ate more than an apple--" but the man didn't let her finish.

"For the love of Talos... Shut up." As she heard him dismiss her, she rolled her eyes and reached out her hand.

"Give me. The. Book." For the first time in hours, his eyes left the daedric symbols and up to Lydia. They were droopy and red, but they gave a clear warning to back off.

"Do not test me, Lydia."

"You are going to collapse if you don't sleep! At least let me take at look at it." He sat back in his chair and kept on reading.

"You can't read daedric. There isn't anything you can do. Leave me alone." He was growing impatient.

"Try me." She challenged.

"Lydia, drop it." He growled lowly.

"Or what?" He felt his attempts to stay calm fly out the window as he stood up abruptly and slammed the book down, sending his chair flying backwards behind him.

"Lydia! You are my housecarl, and I didn't ask you for any help. Not stop pestering me you incompetent wench!" As soon as the last word left his lips, he felt guilt lay heavily in his gut. Lydia stood up so fast that she nearly knocked over her chair too. She bowed her head and left to her room.

The dragon blood pulsed in the mans veins, and he could feel fire tingling in his fingertips. But his heart crumpled at the sight of Lydia's crushed expression. He remembered how her fists were clenched and her eyes were cast to the floor. She almost looked like a broken servant. He didn't want her to feel like a lesser human being. He wanted her to feel like his equal. Great job he was doing at that. He quickly grabbed at the wretched journal and swung his arm, letting the book sail the through the room. It crashed against the far wall with a thud and knocked over a few tankards.

A few minutes passed until he was overcome with guilt, his anger completely gone, and he walked up to her room. At first, he didn't dare knock on her door because he knew how she got when she was upset. But his knuckles rasped lightly on the wood before he chickened out.

Lydia was lying down on her straw bed, looking up at the wood ceiling. She knew that he didn't mean what he said, he was just too tired to think properly, but he ordered her to stop being so damn annoying and she disobeyed. Knowing this didn't help ease the pain of being yelled at either. Her job was to follow his directions and protect him. She was just a housecarl and that was all she'd ever be to him. When she was assigned to be his housecarl she knew from the beginning that it was going to be difficult to not fall for him, and that it was a bad idea to pursue the all mighty dragonborn. He'd probably find another woman better than her, or he would turn her down in a not so nice way... He might even dismiss her. What was a housecarl with no thane to protect? But even with all this against the idea, she let her heart win. And look where that got her.

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