Off the Record

Chapter 1

Moving back in with his parents had never been a part of Cooper's plan.

For many of his college friends, it had been precisely the plan. Get a degree, live with the parents rent free for a few years (they all seemed to have sympathetic parents who understood the economy was in shambles), save up some money, buy a modest house or condo somewhere they actually wanted to live, and settle down for a bit before seeing where life took them next.

Cooper had snickered at these plans. Why would anyone want to move back in with their parents? He had been eager to strike out on his own and be a real adult in a big city. Get a degree, secure an entry level position at a publishing house, find an epic apartment in Cambridge complete with equally epic roommates, and worry about buying a home when the time came. By any measure, he had succeeded.

Until he had failed.

Of course, now that it was too late, he saw his friends as the practical, prescient people that they were. According to Facebook, Craig was getting married and buying in Somerville. Derek had bought in Belmont. Freddie was looking in Brooklyn. And Cooper? He had gotten the degrees and the entry level job at a modest publishing house and a livable apartment with a few tolerable roommates in Allston, all without much help from his parents. (He would admit to some help. A college fund for his bachelor's degree, for instance, and a few sizable birthday checks over the years.) The one thing he hadn't bothered to get was a safety net in case it all went south. And then it had and now he was right back where he started, in Cobham, Massachusetts, rarely posting enthusiastic updates to Facebook due to the shame of still living with his parents at 25 years old.

In his mind, Coop was a modern day Icarus, punished for flying too close to the sun. In reality, he had born in the wrong decade (his career of choice was archaic) and his privileges (male, white, rich) had left him ill prepared for the disappointments of the real world. When the going got tough, Cooper Van Ness, who had never had to work hard for anything in his life, had coped in some of the worst ways possible. And then he was left with no choice but to accept his parents' offer of (more) assistance. Not another check, but in the form of near constant supervision. Oh, how it had humbled him.

Somewhat. Conditions were such that, once he had moved back home, he only needed to hang in there for a year. At 26, he would be given his trust fund and he could try again on his own terms with his own space. (He loved his parents--Jonah and Lois Van Ness--but they looked persistently concerned, as if at any moment he would relapse and they would have to clean up a new mess and once more endure questions from their friends and the inevitable behind-the-back whispers. If only he had been a more rebellious and disagreeable adolescent, he might have better prepared them for his quarter-life crisis.) He had been naive, yes, but he wasn't foolish. Coop wouldn't make the same mistakes. This time, he would do it right. Now he was drafting new plans.

"So, how soon do I get the money? Is this like a 'day of' thing, or do I have to wait for some paperwork to go through?" he asked. He reached for his wine glass. Dinner was winding down. Cooper had been building up to this question all evening. For a couple of rich people, his parents didn't like actually talking about money. Thus he'd spent the last 20 minutes talking about his goals--write a novel, find an arts non-profit board on which to serve, travel profusely--for the rest of his life, with the aim of then discussing how to finance them.

Across the table, Jonah and Lois set down their silverware in synchronized motion, and finished chewing bites of steak and salmon, respectively. Dinner with his parents for his birthday was a well established tradition in the Van Ness household. This year it was the evening before his birthday. It was also tradition for them to choose the restaurant. (They had allowed him to choose one year and to invite his friends. He picked Chuck E. Cheese. They never asked his opinion again.) So despite the fact that Cooper was mostly vegetarian, they had brought him to a steak house, whereupon he had ordered a baked potato and a side salad. Consequently, he had finished some ten minutes ago, about halfway through his prepared speech masquerading as conversation.