Clueless

34.CONFUSION

"Open up, Raech! Enough of your drama!", said a familiar voice.

"Jake!", I whispered.

I rushed to the door and opened it. There he was standing infront of me. After a long time I felt peace. Jake always made me feel like at home. I saw unnie and Kim Tan oppa standing behind him. Both of the. Looked worried. Lizzie came towards me and brushed her head against my leg.

"She also missed you. God look at you. Your eyes! You look like a zombie.", he said as he smiled though his eyes showed that he was worried.

I couldn't control my self. Tears rolled down my cheek as I rushed towards him and hugged him. He hugged me back and rubbed my back.

"Its okay. I am here now.", he said. After a while he took me to the bathroom and washed my face and then unnie brought me food. I denied but Jake forced and ended up feeding me.

After I was finished eating, he said, "Now tell me everything. I am very angry you didn't tell me a thing. But I knew you were lying. So I called at home two days ago and that lady told me everything and hurried here. How could you not tell me. Worried about the promise you made to me. Well yeah you broke it. Now tell me.", he said without stopping.

I broke into tears as I told him everything. He listened carefully without interuption. When I completed he wipped my tears off.

"Woah! That was something.", he said clearing his throat. "Have you figured out?"

"No Jake. I am so confused. I don't know. I like both of them. On one hand is Lee, the perfect kinda guy I always wanted. He is smart, polite and so caring. And on the other hand Jaemin, who is a complete jerk or I should say was. But he has a soft and caring side to him. I don't know what to do. Both of them are so good.", I said sobbing.

"Rachael, don't choose the better guy. Choose the one who makes you feel better.", he said taking my hand.

Choose the one who makes you feel better. Who made me feel better? Who was it?

"Choosing is not an option now. About Jaemin I don't know but Lee hates me. He didn't contact me after told him everything.", I said.

"Lee comes everyday near your building. Kim saw him a lot of times. He even asked Lee to come up but he didn't and instead told him not to tell you. How can you say he hates you! Did he tell you!", he said.

"Oh my gosh. Jaemin also came everyday. Both of them...", I trailed of.

"Yeah! They do. Now its upto you to decide whom you want to be with!", he said.

Later after Jake went to sleep, I stood awake whole night thinking. After a lot of thought I realised this was not an option. I dared not go back to Lee. Aftet what I did to him, I will never be able to see him in his eyes even though he may would forgive me and it would hurt Jaemin too. And how could even think of going back to Jaemin after hurting Lee. I couldn't be so shameless.

I thought and thought whole night. Whom did liked more? Who made me feel better? Lee or Jaemin?