phil scooped his raven black hair out of my eyes and pressed the call button, biting harshly at his lip. what did dan have to say to him? millions of possible conversations filled his head as he waited for dan to pick up. suddenly, dan's ever so slightly tanned face appeared on screen and a subconscious smile slid onto phil's lips.
"hey dan!" he chirped, giggling gently. phil examined dan's face through the webcam. shadows from the furniture cast themselves on dan's face and his gorgeous deep brown eyes took phil's breath away when they flicked up to meet his pale blue ones. dan looked nervous, his cheeks stained pink and his eyes unusually wide.
"phil.. we need to talk about the kiss."
phil felt his heart drop. he'd been trying so incredibly hard to avoid this conversation, but now it was here. phil shakily breathed out and attempted to appear casual.
"alright." he agreed, keeping his smile pasted on his mouth- though it was starting to pull on his lips and making his face hurt. dan shuffled around and bit his lip through the webcam,
"did it... did it mean anything to you?"
phil froze. no... right? but, as phil looked up into the webcam, staring into dan's pixilated eyes, he found it harder to admit.
"i- i don't know." phil mumbled quietly, tearing his eyes away from the screen. silence fell apon them for a few moments.
"i.. i've been trying to recalibrate my past and everything.. i'm just really confused." phil stammered out, avoiding dan's eyes. dan nodded softly, trying not to show how much he was hurting.
"phil.. i." dan began, but phil quickly cut him off.
"i can't do this now, dan." phil mumbled, ignoring dan's protests and ending the call.
ー
"what was that about?" tyler mumbled, walking into the living room in his joggers and 'TRXYE' sweatshirt. phil jumped a little at the sound of his roommates voice and sighed deeply, biting down on his lip.
"i.. i kissed dan." he murmured, causing the american's jaw to fall open in shock.
"yOU DID WHAT?!"
"i kissed him. it was a drunk kiss but, i don't know if it meant something or not." he cleared his throat and felt his cheeks burn. tyler sat down and ran his fingers through his his hair.
"so you're telling me, you kissed dan?"
"yes."
"dan howell?"
"yes.."
"super cute, dreamy eyed dan howell?"
"..yes.."
"why didn't you bang him?"
"TYLER!!"
"ok, uh, kidding." tyler flashed phil a small smile and leaned forward, thinking to himself before opening his mouth.
"well.. do you have feelings for him?"
phil thought about it and closed his eyes, breathing out shakily.
"yes."
tyler nodded slightly and bit his lip.
"take a risk then. what are you so afraid of?" tyler asked him in a surprisingly soft tone.
phil looked up with a clouded expression.
"i.. i just feel like he isn't telling me something."
ー
phil hesitated before rapping lightly on the door, waiting for entrance. once it was open, he was face to face with dan.
"yes?" the hazel haired boy grumbled, obviously annoyed at phil.
"i'm sorry." phil admitted, pressing his lips together. he waited in silence before dan sighed and held the door open.
"come in."
the ebony haired boy shyly walked into dan's apartment and sat down on his couch, tentatively. he opened his mouth to apologise again.
"i'm so-"
"it's ok, phil. i shouldn't have pushed you that far." dan sat next to phil, smiling uo at him gently. the dark eyed boy licked his bottom lip and stared ahead, lost in his thoughts. phil's heart leapt a little and he felt himself getting more and more anxious. dan turned his gaze back to phil and opened his mouth to speak.
"do you want anything t-"
"i have feelings for you." phil blurted out, his heart racing. dan sat there, his expression unreadable. swear crawled down phil's neck as he noticed dan tense up.
"i.. i didn't know what i wanted." phil began, his throat hoarse.
"i originally wanted my memory, my past. but.. i've come to realise that's all just tied in with what i truly want and need." he continued, looking into dan's eyes with a soft expression.
"i want you, danny." he whispered so quietly it was almost inaudible. he examined dan's next movements extremely carefully. a breath in, a breath out. then his eyes floated to phil's and the next moment, their lips were locked together and dan's hands were in his hair. phil gasped a little but quickly kissed him back, wrapping his arms tightly around dan's waist as the younger boy straddled him, holding him in place and smiling against his lips. the two kissed each other with passion and drive, tangling their fingers in each other's hair. phil moved slightly to get a better grip on dan and dan pulled away, frowning a little.
"you meant, like romantic feelings right?"
phil chuckled breathily, his cheeks flushing pink. and nodded before brushing their lips together again.
