monsoon days

a full-fledged storm

          The clock is ticking, and the storm is brewing. There's an altar full of people out there; friends and family, people who mean a lot to her. Yet, she's only worrying about the one person who won't come, and how she wishes he will.

She knows she should let go of the hope that Harry would arrive at the last moment and save her from the wedding. That doesn't happen in the real world. This isn't a movie or a novel, its life, and in life, what's the guarantee for happiness?

Jemma rises from her chair and heads towards the altar doors, about to start her new life as Missus Jemma Douglas, the wife of Kevin Douglas.

It doesn't even sound right.

          The clock is ticking, and the storm is brewing. Jemma and Kevin are supposed to leave for one of his business functions, but the storm outside is making it hard. She sits in front of her dressing table and starts to take off her jewelry, watching her husband on the mirror, doing... nothing.

He never looks at her, not once. He never seems to. Their marriage doesn't make any sense to her. They don't communicate except for the occasional small-talk, and it's killing her.

She wishes and she wishes and she wishes every day that it was another classmate of hers whom she married.

          The clock is ticking, and the storm is brewing. Jemma cannot hold it in anymore. It has been three months of their dull, loveless marriage and she finally snaps.

"Why did you have to ruin my life?" she remembers asking her mother amongst the screaming and crying. She is tired, exhausted, frustrated. She cannot go on with this any longer.

"It's for your best," the woman replied. "It always has been."

Jemma doesn't believe her words.

          The clock is ticking, and the storm is brewing. It is a child they want, to end the storm and bring rainbows and sunshine to their life. It is a child everyone wishes for, hopes for, prays for, and it is a child Jemma has to give them.

She locks eyes with Kevin to know how he feels, but he is no better than the people she calls her parents. She can never read those eyes of a stranger, as she never has been. She remembers that even when they were younger, Kevin would rarely talk to others. He would never express how he felt, what he felt. He is her husband now. He is so close to her, yet so far.

She gives up trying to read him, and meekly manages a nod.

          The clock is ticking, and the storm is brewing. Jemma is unsure of how to begin this conversation. She would look for a time when Kevin is in a pleasant mood, but she can never understand any of his moods. She chooses early in the morning however, when he is leaving for work, to just go with her instincts and let it out.

"If it's a boy," she calls out after him, her voice still a little shaky, "I've always liked the name Harry."

She holds in her breath and waits, till he finally asks, "Like that boy in our class?" Jemma doesn't respond. She only watches him, and tries not to let it show how much this means to her. "It's nice."

Her smile at that moment cannot be hidden, and Jemma makes peace with the fact that in some or the other, Harry Walloby will never leave her life.