I looked across the classroom to see the most flawless face staring back. Danny's soft, brown hair brushed swiftly to the side. His light, blue eyes were friendly. Much more inviting than Steven's. He smiled at me and looked back to the teacher. I couldn't understand how beautiful one boy could be. His large hands gripping onto the pen moved to his head and he brushed his hair back. He was simply perfect. And I knew nobody was perfect and everyone had flaws. But that's what made him perfect; his flaws. The simple things about him that aren't described as "perfect" are what makes my knees go weak and make me go numb. When he talked... it was as if there was warm chocolate being poured onto my tongue. I couldn't get enough of him. And whenever he looked upset I just wanted to pull him close to me and kiss him better. I didn't like the fact that I didn't talk to him as much as I wanted to. I had the most horrible feeling that he wanted nothing more than to avoid me. But at the same time all I wanted was to talk to him. I wasn't sure whether or not I should risk my chances of being embarrassed if I talked to him and he laughed in my face. But he did it for me, he talked to me. Him. Daniel. The person who I couldn't stop thinking of. The only person I couldn't live without. Nobody would ever understand what Danny meant to me. Not even myself. Because it was him who had always been there to put a smile on my face, even if it was just because he said "hello" or asked how I was. Even if he was just in a rush to get to class and he slipped past me. It still meant something to me that I knew he was actually there. Every girl had that one time when they were just a little girl and read or watched fairytales. It made them want a prince of their own; their own perfect half. And in my mind Danny was the exact definition of a prince. He was what I thought was my perfect half. My soul mate and life long lover. As long as I knew him, which was a pretty long time, he had always made an attempt to talk to me. Even back when I was happy and when my parents were together, when I was able to talk to whoever I wanted and talk about whatever I wanted. It used to be different. I wasn't always a depressed nineteen year old girl. I wasn't always like this. I used to have a perfectly clean stomach, wrists and thighs. I used to smile and it would be real. I used to be happy. I used to not go into my room every night, take out my blade and slice my own skin over and over and over again until I couldn't even feel the pain anymore because it was so numb. And I used to not cry for hours on end until I was so worn out that I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. That was the thing, though. Any day that Danny made an effort to talk to me or smile, I resisted the urge to cut. I just thought of what I'd be losing. He was literally the only thing was keeping me alive. A thought crept into my mind that I didn't want to imagine doing because of what would follow. I had to break up with Steven. I had to. He hurt me. He abused me; verbally and physically. He got me to do things I never wanted to do with him. But if I broke up with him I would have bruises all over me for a long while. He wouldn't be happy. But it was the only thing that I could do, right? I wanted Danny to be mine and for me to be his for so long that I couldn't remember when I first started thinking like this. I wanted to feel his kisses all along my neck and jaw. I wanted to press my lips against his plump lips every second of every day. I wanted to hear his voice in my ear; sweet nothings that made my spine shiver. I didn't just want him, I needed him.
The sudden breeze of cool air made my hair blow wildly. There were buttercups and daisies blossoming in nearly every green. The colours were like a beautiful painting. The dark evergreen trees blew slightly as the firerce wind danced among the landscape. Although even though the wind was strong and was difficult to manoeuvre in, the sun was shining high in the sky and sending rays of light down and reflected off of all the cars in the packed car park. I was disappointed to see such bad weather in mid-May but I didn't mind all that much. I awaited for Charlie to appear from the school so we could head home. There were tons of students walking out from the gloomy building. I spotted Charlie's brown hair and smiled to myself. He was such a great brother and friend. I was extremely proud of him. He always got good grades, from what I heard all the girls had a crush on him and he was musically talented. We had always had a special bond like most siblings. But we had a connection that only we understood. He acted like an older brother and tried his best to talk about my problems and try help but was also just a little wimp so I could push him around and get him to do my chores. But I loved him really. He arrived and looked at me with earnest eyes.
"Hey Lottie. How's your day been?" he asked with a grin on his face.
"It's been good, little man. What are you so happy about?"
Charlie was the kind of guy who couldn't help but show his emotions. You got this vibe from him that made you feel cheerful whenever he was in a good mood which was nearly all the time. I always felt that whenever he was upset , the feeling passed to me. But normally he was a bubbly guy.
He giggled and opened the car door. "Nah, it's nothing."
I punched at his arm. "C'mon, buddy, you can tell me anything!"
"Okay, okay. Well you know that girl who I like?" he sounded proud. I could clearly see where this was going.
I nodded.
"Yeah, well she asked could she listen to me perform my new song and she told me she liked me!" Charlie was smiling down at the floor of the car.
"Ah my little bro has a girlfriend!"
He looked at me with hope but frowned. "She isn't my girlfriend..." then he smirked, "Yet."
We laughed for a short moment and then I started to drive. I was glad that the day was over and couldn't wait until the week was over. I made it one of my top priorities to break up with Steven on Saturday.
