For Your Eyes Only;

Glow-in-the-dark

 SEPTEMBER

RJ please call me love I can't I don't know what to do RJ Grace died this morning I don't know what to do RJ I was just there holding her hand last night she's so young how can this happen please call me RJ please I need you

3:55 AM

"Maine?"

"RJ...RJ...Grace is..."

"Baby...Maine, I'm so sorry, I don't know what to say..."

"She's...RJ I didn't know...I was just promising her last night that I would tell her a new story the next time I come to visit and...RJ, Grace just celebrated her fourth birthday last month..."

"It's not easy, mahal. I know. I'm really sorry you're in so much pain right now too. We both are,"

"I really really want to hug you right now, RJ,"

"Maine, I'm hugging you right now inside my head. I always do, when I think of you."

"Thank you for being here for me always, mahal."

"I wish I can do better. You deserve more than my imaginary arms, Maine."

"Your arms, imaginary or not, is always appreciated, RJ. Please just give me thirty seconds, love...I just...I just need to let this out..."

"Take all the time you need, Maine."

"One...two...huhuhuhuhu...three..."

"..."

"...twenty eight...huhuhuhu...twenty nine....huhuhuhu...thirty."

"You're both heartbreaking and adorable when you do that, you know?"

"It's a childhood habit,"

"Why do you always count to thirty when you cry?"

"Kailangan kasi ang pag-iyak, dapat may time limit."

"And the time limit is thirty seconds?"

"Sort of. Well, I know the pain can't possibly disappear that fast...but it's how I remind myself that I shouldn't cry forever. That the pain will go away after some time and I would learn eventually how to heal."

"Have I ever told you how fascinated I am with your mind?"

"You always do, RJ. Hindi ka napapagod bolahin ako. Thank you."

"Huy, hindi kita binobola. Never. I am truly in love with your beautiful mind, Maine."

"Okay."

"And your beautiful face. And your beautiful body."

"RICHARD FAULKERSON JR. CAN YOU PLEASE—"

"I love you, Maine. Sorry."

"It's okay. I love your body too but that's beside the point, jesus what were we even talking about? Bakit lagi na lang tayo nauuwi sa harot?"

"Baby, please feel better soon, ha? I know this is a huge shock for you, for all of us, pero let's just hope that Grace is in a better place now. At least she will not have to endure the suffering anymore,"

"RJ, why is life so hopeless?"

"Maine..."

"I'm sorry, love. Ang emo ko ba?"