Chapter Seventeen

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And you can see my heart beating,

You can see it through my chest,

Said I'm terrified but I'm not leaving,

RUSSIAN ROULETTE– RIHANNA

RUSSIAN ROULETTE– RIHANNA

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Theron

God do I know how Blaise is feeling right now. This kind of loss and pain I wouldn't wish on anyone.

"Blaise! Open the door!" Smitty Ray won't stop shouting and pounding on the door. We've been outside about two hours now and Bobby Ray has given up trying to get Smitty Ray to stop and was sitting on the stairs.

"Look, Theron and I are going home Smitty. Blaise clearly doesn't want to see us far less for you so..." Bobby stands and takes hold of my arm and practically drags me to the car.

"Why did you do that?" I asked Bobby Ray when we parked in the garage.

"Mom, dad and Ky won't be back till nine and Smitty won't be home till Blaise opens that door" and then his lips were on mine and I think I just died and went to heaven again.

"Meet me in my room." Bobby whispers against my lips and I'm left there panting till my brain rebooted and processed what he just said.

Before my foot could hit the first stair Bobby Ray had me trapped in his arms.

"You were taking too long." he says against my throat and carries me up the stairs and tosses me onto his bed.

Our clothes went flying and today I, Theron Monroe got my first blowjob.

"Bobby Ray?" I whispered hoping he didn't fall asleep holding me so tightly while we're both naked.

"Yea."

"What are we doing?" I asked staring at his ceiling. I'm scared. I'm freaking terrified.

Does he like me?

Is he using me?

Is he even gay?

Will we ever be anything more than this?

And what the hell was this exactly?

Am I an experiment to him?

"Hey." I snap back to myself when Bobby Ray shakes me a bit.

"Huh?" I asked dumbly and Bobby Ray strokes my cheek.

"Don't think about it so hard. We... I like you Theron." Bobby Ray mumbled and I jolted a bit. Shit, he can't like me.

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