Him

Chapter Three

I walk out of the classroom, leaving Xavier giggling behind me. I see Hope, just kind of hanging out by her locker and I walk over to her.
"Hey sweetheart, you okay?" I ask her, genuinely concerned.
"What? Oh yeah, I am. Just waiting for you." She tells me, I can tell something is off but I don't know if I wanna push it.
"Promise you're okay?"
"Yes baby, I promise." Hope tells me, wrapping her arms around my waist. "Maybe we could..we could get outta here?" she asks me quietly.
"And go do what?"I ask, slightly scared.
"I dunno, maybe just. You know. Do what every other couple is doing nowadays."
"Oh, uhm I guess.." I say, trying to hide my uncomfortableness. I know, it's stupid. Why wouldn't I want to sleep with her? We've been dating for so long, and its not like she's not a beauty. I clear my mind and just walk with her out of the school. I'll figure it out later.
+*+*+*+*+

Once we get to my house, I unlock the door and make sure nobody is home. Part of me is wishing someone would be home, but to no suprise we're alone. Hope looks at me happily and reaches for the hem of my shirt. Next thing I know I'm shirtless and just sitting on the couch.
"Baby, what is wrong with you? I thought you wanted to do this?" Hope says, I know she's not trying to act angry but it's coming off that way.
"Hope, I'm sorry. I can't."
"And why not? Was Dalton right or something? Was it that boy in your class today that you so happened to "accidentally" fall into his lap??" I can hear Hope getting pissed and I feel terrible.
"Hope..please. I'm sorry. I'm just not comfortable with this. I'm just confused. I'm sorry." I can hear the desperation in my voice, I don't even know why I'm upset. Xavier isn't even that important to me.
"Whatever Oliver. I knew you weren't ever going to love me. You're such an ass. I bet there's some other girl waiting around for you to fuck. Don't ever talk to me again you fucker." Hope yells at me, and I can feel the tears building in my eyes. I'm not trying to be a baby, but I just hurt someone I never thought I'd hurt. Hope grabs her book bag off my couch and throws something to the floor. She yanks my front door open and slams it shut. Leaving me in a cold room, with tears streaming down my face. Why does this hurt so much? I never really felt love towards her, but she was my best friend, and I hurt her. How could I have done that..?
I put my face in my hands and lose my mind. What's so wrong with me? Why did I let Xavier get to me? Why did I let Hope leave?
+*+*+*+*+*+

I wake up on my couch, my head pounding and my vision blurry. I must've cried myself to sleep. I grab my phone and notice I have no messages. Then it hits me again,  Hope's gone. I breathe in deeply and stand up, feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. I can't believe I let her down. I walk to my room and just collapse on my bed. I don't know how I'm supposed to forgive myself. I close my eyes and try to think of something that makes me happy. Next thing I know all I can think about is these light green eyes with little gold specks floating around in them.

Xavier.
Xavier.
Xavier.