Chapter 36-"What do we have here?"
Bell's pov
I opened my eyes and squinted scanning the room. Beth's? I guess i crashed here. A pain started invading my head and i closed my eyes ducking my head beneath the cover's Beth and I shared. "Bethhhhh" i spoke shaking the bed.
"Hmmm?" she hummed placing her hand on my back,
"My head" i said as i kept my eyes shut. What the hell did i do last night for my head to ache this fucking much? Then it all came back. Carl and Enid.. Beth and I getting Drunk. Then blurriness.
"Here" Beth has leaning over and grabbing something as i felt the bed shift, I took my head from the cover's to see she had 2 small blue pill's in her hand. I Immedently took them and ducked back under the covers.
"Beth what happened last night?" I asked knowing she wouldn't drink as much as i might've. i mean come on she's beth.
"We drank. Well you drank. We went to see someone and you just giggled and made dirt angels all night" She said and i smiled thinking of a 'Out of it' Bell making snow angel's.
"C'mon you have to get up" Beth said as she grabbed on my arm.
"Nope" i said as i retracted my arm and cuddled with a pillow.
"Isabel!" she said raising her voice.
"Beth!" i mocked and she huffed before i heard her footsteps go out of the room.
"Here" I heard and looked up to see her holding Popcorn and some M&M'S i smiled taking them from her and i started eating them.
"Lazy day?" she asked and i nodded as i took bites from the creamy cernal bag.
"Ill be right back" I said as i got up and went into the bathroom. I washed my face, seeing how puffy it was. I looked down at my wrists. What 2-3 months clean? I-I want to feel the pain again. I need to feel the pain again. I looked around the bathroom and found a razor. I broke it taking in a deep breath.
I sliced, "You're worthless"
Again, "You're Fat"
And again, "You're ugly"
I did this process over and over again feeling the burn on each one. I felt the tears fall over when i felt as if i had enough. Exact for one more.
"He doesn't Love you" I whispered as i sliced a little farther down my arm then the rest of them. I sighed flushing the blade as standing up. I leaned over the sink gazing at myself. What the Fuck even is life anymore? I mean we are in the middle of all this stupid shit. I need something new. I can't keep being the same happy little bell I've always been. Cause at the end of the day. Nothing is happy.
I cleaned up my arms before walking from the bathroom and making my decision. I would only let close ones in. No one else.
"You good" Beth asked and i nodded sitting down next to her.
"Yeah, I'm good" i mumbled as i took another bite from the bag.
"Beth i want to change" i said finally getting it off my chest.
"Why?" she asked looking at me in disbelief.
"I'm too soft, I want to be more like Maggie. Tuff" i said in all seriousness.
"Well, we could try to make you 'Tuff' " She said thinking to herself.
"How?" i asked and we made eye contact her blue eyes sparking with ideas.
"Lets go kill some walker ass!" she laughed and i agreed.
We walked over to my place to grab my 'things' then we snuck over the gate.
There were no walker's in sight when we first got over the gate but then one came from no where, I walked up to it stabbing it's head then we kept walking. We found a little medow filled with tree's and beautiful Flowers. "Hey Beth wanna see my little cottage" i asked a smile brining my face.
"Hell yeah!" she joked and we walked down the paved road soon having to hide in a house from a heard of walkers. Once they blew over we kept walking and soon were sanding infant of my cottage.
"Me casa, You casa" i said as i opened the door showing her around. We settled down and started brainstorming ideas of how i could become a bad ass. By now i wasn't really all for the idea since i understand I'm too soft and probably won't change. But its worth a try.
"Shhh do you hear that?" beth said and we listened. It sounded like a truck. We ducked down under a window and watched as a red pick u[ truck stopped in front go the cottage.
"Shit" i mumbled as i made beth follow me to the bedroom where we hid in the large dresser.
"Whoo ho ho! Nega is gonna have a blast with this place." A voice spoke.
"Yeah maybe him and sherry will come here!" another boomed.
"Wait shhhh" The first one said as their footsteps approached us. I held my breath and closed my eyes hopping the dresser door wouldn't fly open.
"What do we have here?"
