Deny And Question

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You sat in the classroom of your last class for the day,creative writing.Your teacher in this class was Mrs.Thompson,your favorite teacher.She was the kindest person to you,and she would always try to help you with everything.But,you never told her about Gilbert,it would hurt her heart if she knew.Even so,you enjoy her company,and she enjoys yours.You always spend as much time as possible in the classroom,it will be sad for you when she has to retire.But,she was very healthy for her age,so that will be a long time from now.The classroom felt more like home than than your own real home.You loved everything about it.Well,almost everything...except for Gilbert and his girlfriend.This class would be a sanctuary if they would just piss off.But,you still endure it,and sit as far from the evil couple as you can.

The chime of the late bell rang,indicating all else who enter the classroom are now..well,late.Of course,seconds after the bell,Gilbert and his girlfriend,Michelle are in class,as usual,making their stupid "grand" entrance.You rolled your eyes in disgust,as they sit next to each other and begin making out.Mrs.Thompson looked up from her papers and to the class,not noticing the couple eating each other's faces."Good evening class!Today,we are going to take what we have practiced through the year,and apply it." She said cheerily."I would like you to write about how you feel about a situation that you encountered in your life,that made you feel diffrently about something or someone,and the thoughts that you have encountered along with it.You will turn it in next week.This gives several days to work on it.So I expect quality work!You may start on it right now,begin." And with that,she sat at her desk correcting some work from earlier.


Your POV


I looked down at my binder paper.I need to start off with a rough draft,but how do I know what to write,if I don't know what to write about.I looked up,and my eyes automatically looked at Gilbert.He was talking to Michelle.
"Gilbert had such a strange expression.He doesn't look like the scary Gilbert that wants to slit my throat.He seems like any normal teenage boy,and kinda goofy actually.I feel like I've always seen him like this.The emotion that he shows as of right now seems so natural.Now that I think of it,the emotion he shows when he bullies me seems forced.As if someone had told him to do it.Or am I just making excuses to not be mad at him for his attitude?No,I can't be.I hate him,and he hates me.But why do I feel the need to feel bad for him?" I asked all these things mentally.


Am I just overthinking feelings I conceal?
This gut feeling I'm trying to get off me as well.

Third Person POV
You thought while you stared at Gilbert.You looked down at your paper.You had unintentionally written down what you were thinking as you were looking at Gilbert.You sighed mentally and looked up at him again,wondering why you felt this way about him.Michelle felt your gaze,and glanced over to you.You quickly looked down at your paper."Shit!She saw me!I'm so damn stupid!" You though in you head,as you mentally scolded yourself.Michelle laughed and bent forward to whisper to Gilbert.You felt tears painfully making their way to your eyes,you knew she was going to tell him that you were staring at him.He will use it against you.But,before she could open her mouth,Mrs.Thompson stopped her from speaking,"Michelle,that's it.Pick an empty seat away from Gilbert,now."

She rolled her eyes and stood up.She looked around the class for an empty spot.But there was none,or so you thought.She moved her gaze to you.She then looked to your left,and saw an empty seat.You wanted to scream for her to get away,but she walked closer to the seat with a scowl on her face.She sat down and you looked to your
right side,at the wall.You awaited for whatever venomous words awaited to drip out of her mouth.

"Ew,all I wanted to to was warn my boyfriend that he had a stalker.And now I'm sitting next to her."Michelle said as she twirled one of her pig tails.That hairstyle matches her,she really is a pig.I know she's cheating on Gilbert."Well,at least I'm not a slut..." You muttered.She locked her eyes on you,"What was that,you little bitch?You are the slut,you were checking out my man!" Her words hurt you.They weren't true.You weren't checking him out with those flirtatious gazes like the ones Michelle would give off.What a backwards hypocrite!You were filled with rage.
"This is all that old hag's fault.If Mrs.Thompson left me alone I wouldn't have to deal with such a low slut like you!" Michelle said coldly.You took one of her locks and pulled it,"You shut the hell up!If you had done your work,you would be sitting with your stupid boyfriend!Or,should I say one of your many boy friends,you slut!" You say as you let go of her hair.

She looks at you with anger in her eyes. "Well,Let's see what work,you've done,other than insult me" She reached for the piece of binder paper on your desk,the one with everything you were thinking of while you were looking at Gilbert.She snatched it and read it over.

You watched in fear of her reaction.She held a smirk on her lips."It seems like you are in a state of denial.Did you really think that Gilbert would actually not want to purposely bully you?Hah,stop trying to make yourself feel better!" She said as she carefully folded the paper and placed it in her pocket.The chimes came from the intercom.It was a signal that school is over for the day."Well,I got to show your little letter to Gilly.See ya!" And with that,she walked to Gilbert and the two left the classroom.You stood up and dumped your things into your bag.Before exiting,you waved a small "Goodbye" to Mrs.Thompson,and she waved back.You then left and ran to the exit of the school,with tears falling down your face.What will Gilbert think of you now?
Gilbert's POV
I was walking home with Michelle,again.She told me that (Y/N) was staring at me in our last class.Was she really?Why would she look at me?Wouldn't she rather pretend I don't exist while I'm not making fun of her or hurting her?I hid the fact that I had all of these questions on my mind and just let out a fake cocky laugh to make it seem like everything was normal,"Well,who wouldn't look at me!I'm awesome!But,don't worry...you're the only one for me!" I said,and kissed Michelle.She released a look of guilt,like she did something wrong."What's wrong,babe?" I asked.Her guilty look faded away,"N-nothing!Umm...I'm just mad because (Y/N) was soo rude to me!" I mentally released a confused hum.(Y/N) would never be rude,not on purpose,at least."W-what did she do?"I asked.Michelle waved it off,"That doesn't matter...but this does.She showed me a folded piece of paper.I look at it,and take it from her hand."Well,here's my house babe,see you!" She kissed me and went in her house.Once she left,I continued walking to my house,with the paper in my hand.I wonder what it is?

Once I walked in my house, I yelled,"I'm home!" No answer.I shrugged it off and went up to my bedroom.While I closed the door,I remembered the paper Michelle gave me.I took it out of my pocket and sat at my desk.As I looked out of the window,I noticed that it was raining.It looked peaceful.Once I was done admiring the scene,I took the paper.As I unfolded it,more raindrops hit my window.I then looked at the handwriting,it was (Y/N)'s...

I read it out loud,"Gilbert has such a strange expression." Wait,was she looking at me when she wrote this?I shrugged it off and read on,"He doesn't look like the scary Gilbert that want's to slit my throat." Wait,slit her throat?Am I really that mean to her?I would never want to kill her.Well...then again,I kinda threw her onto the floor at one point.I sighed,and read on,"He seems like any normal teenage boy,and kinda goofy actually.I feel like I've always seen him like this.The emotion that he shows as of right now seems so natural.Now that I think of it,the emotion he shows when he bullies me seems forced.As if someone had told him to do it.Or am I just making excuses to not be mad at him for his attitude?" My eyes widened at this.I set the paper down and looked out of the window.
Staring at two different views on your window ledge...

I tried to think back at what I just read.Am I really being forced to bully (Y/N)?Wait,no.I wanted to do this,right?I'm doing it on my free will.But,why does it not feel that way?All I wanted at first was to just talk to her,after soo long.Then...I...realized she forgot who I was.Then I bullied her.But how could she forget me after what we went through?


Flash Back
Gilbert's POV

I sat alone on the playground as kids threw insults on me."You wierd albino freak!" One kid yelled.I just sat,trying not to cry."He can't even speak English! What a dummy!" They also laughed when I spoke German,they said that it sounded lame."Hey,leave him alone you bastards!" A girl's voice yelled.I looked up.It was (Y/N)."Say something mean again!I dare you to!" She said to the kids who were teasing me,as she shook a balled fist at them.They all ran off,crying and screaming.I just looked at her in awe.She was so awesome,and confident!She walked up to me and sat by me.

"Are you alright?" She asked.I nodded my head.I could understand English,just not speak it well.She smiled at me."What is your name?" I blushed,she really wants to know me!I responded,"Gibert Bielschmidt..." She chuckled and it caused me to blush more."Well,I'm (Y/N) (L/N)!I heard you speak German.Can you teach me?" I nodded my head shyly.After I met (Y/N),I was always confident,because of her.And...she was my first crush...
10 Years Old Since I met (Y/N) when we were five,we were always together.Until that one day.(Y/N) came to my house.

"What's up (Y/N)!" I responded happily.(Y/N) had a sad expression."What's wrong?" I asked,ready to beat up anyone who might have hurt her feelings."I-I'm moving away...today.I'm sorry Gilbert..." Tears formed in my eyes.I hugged her small figure tightly,never wanting to let go,"No!I won't let you!" She also cried,but responded,"I...have to.I need to take care of my sick grandmother.I'm sorry." She kissed me,and left...tears would not stop falling that day.

15 Years Old
I was walking to school with Ludwig."Hey...there is a new girl...(Y/N) at the school.I have to show her around."

My eyes widened.Is it... my (Y/N)?Is she back? "Where will you meet her?" I asked my brother."She is at the office right now,I need to meet her there..." He responded.I ran off,not wanting to wait to see my (Y/N).I ran into the building,to the front office.And there she was.(Y/N) (L/N).

slowly walked to her,suprised that it was really her.She looked at me."Hello,may I help you?" She asked.I stood in shock,why is she not reacting?"(Y/N) it's me,Gil.R-ememder?" I said with tears threatening to fall."I can't say that I do,sir...I apologize.I stood there,shocked.SHE FORGOT ME?I ran off,leaving her at the office.I ran to the roof,and cried.I cried,the whole day.Did my first crush...really forget me?"

End Of Flashback

Staring at two different views on your window ledge...
Gilbert's POV
Too hurt to read on after remembering the moments with (Y/N),I threw the paper to the floor.How could she have forgotten the old me?The me who showed I loved her?Now she thinks that I'm a monster.She was the one who forgot me!But,does she deserve being hurt by me?What if I was nice to her instead,and showed I loved her.
Maybe she would remember all of our memories!Ugh,I'm soo stupid!What was I thinking?Maybe she has a good reason for forgetting me!I could have just asked!Or help her remember instead of hurting her!What do I do now?

It's like I'm always causing problems,causing hell.
I didn't mean to put you through this,I can tell...
Are we gonna sweep this under the carpet?

Whew!Done with this chapter!Yes,Michelle is Seychelles.She is only mean for the story tho!No hate!And,yes.You do have a good reason to not remember Gilbert.You got hit in the head by a robber while trying to protect your Grandma when you went to live with her.This is not a spoiler,the you in the story already knows this,so it is ok for
you to know too.Gilbert will find out soon,don't worry.Until next time!!!

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