Inarticulate

(2) Worth

There is no air in my lungs as of now and my eyes begin stinging. I'm fighting the tears but Paige yells and comes to my body.

"Please, they can't take you away from me!" Paige cries but the Capitol representatives like it. They like the tears and they like I have family. They enjoy it so much they send nobody to take me.

"Please stop it, Paige please." I grip my sisters wet face and cries before Jaxton pulls her away from me. Her face is red and flushed.

"Go...just go.." Jaxton urges me and I walk up the steps. The whole district is in silence and I stand there as they are quiet. There is nobody wanting to be tribute. Nobody. The know the chances of a girl surviving in that arena is close to zero.

I am completely stunned and very upset and it's written all over my face.

How could I have been so blind. I am not escaping these games. Paige is still sobbing and before Mallory can pull a male's name Jaxton looks at me. It's like he's scanning my face for something. Any sign of life, I'm guessing.

"Uh, Coile, Clarus?" Mallory says and I exhale but then the look in Jax's eyes. He wasn't kidding.

"I volunteer as tribute!" Jaxton calls out.

His eighteen year old brother looks flustered and upset and his other twelve and seventeen year old brother stare at him.

"Excellent!" Mallory smiles and he clutches the ball and giggles. Capitol representatives make me sick, and Mallory is no exception to that rule.

Jaxton makes his way down the path and there is no sound. More silent than silent because there is a sadness, Jaxton is a baker, archer, trader but most of all a happy kid with friends. He is such a nice boy in school and he is so likeable. However he wanted to do this, and it's completely out of character.

Jaxton steps up the steps and reaches by my side.

"You aren't dying. Not today or tomorrow. Kid." He mumbles.

"What's your name, sir?" Mallory asks.

"I'm Jaxton. Jaxton Kultera." He says while biting his lip.

"No applause?" Jamison questions and the District is still very silent.

Jaxton and I met a while ago. When I was eleven.

I still had William back then, and he and my brother were close. At some point I used to call Jax, my other brother, because he was always at our house. I remember when William died. Our family was in debt, my father dead and now it was us four. Jaxton, helped me. He went hunting with me every Saturday, and every Sunday, whatever else we could find, we would take home. It helped us stay alive. It helped me live.

After the depressing anthem for this nation,we head out and are in custody. I am taken to a room where I am all alone, but I stay put because peacekeepers are watching me, way more than I'm comfortable with. I try and prepare myself, for what I will have to say, and who I will see. I hope girls from my class don't come, because the time they will take up, isn't worth it. My sister's and mother are all who I really need to see, because nobody is as important as them. I have to promise myself, that there will be no tears, I can't look helpless, and afraid. I can't look any more useless than I already look. A short girl, with blonde hair and innocence. The innocence is going to make a target, I can just tell. I fiddle with my fingers, childishly, and occasionally look at my fingers, knowing that these are going to make me kill, these will end lives.

I smile as I realize my mother and siblings come first. They run near me, and I clutch Paige and I look in her eyes, and see it's the same look she gave William, same look when we saw him die, same look when he was being buried. The girls gather round, crying and holding my hands, and I want to speak, but I can't. I am almost compelled to sit here and stay in silence.