Just Kidding, But Seriously...

The Hampsterdance, Ferrero Rocher, and Hybrid Tea

A/N- Hey Happy New Year guys!!! I hope 2014 is a great one for you all :)

Not much to say except that this is all unedited as per usual and I sort of got carried away with the whole gift-buying process so no Valentine's Day this chapter :(

ENJOY, YOU BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE XX

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The weekend that ensued was one of torturous preparation. Two days hardly seemed like enough time to cram in long and tedious shifts at Greasy Joe's, a last-minute science project that had been assigned two weeks before, and spending a disconcerting amount of time at local shopping centers in search of the perfect Valentine's Day gifts to shower Gwen with on that upcoming Monday.

Overall, it was extremely stressful. To the point where I wanted to either punch things or slam my head into a wall. Or both.

My first stop was at CVS Pharmacy, because, contrary to what the name implies, this chain store sold more than just pharmaceutically-related items (although if I had to take a wild guess, I'd say that acronym stood for Crack, Viagra and Steroid). Sure, I could've opted for the more obvious option and hauled my ass over to the local Wal-Mart, but I wasn't particularly in the mood to deal with impossible-to-find parking spaces, ridiculously long lines that stretched from the cashier all the way to freaking Alaska, and individuals who found it cute to go out in public in nothing but a bathrobe and a pair of fluffy rubber ducky slippers.

Getting behind the wheel of my car was probably the most difficult part of that Saturday morning, mainly because I wouldn't be on my own. Mel and Isabel had begged and begged for me to take them along so that they could offer their advice on what gifts would be most suitable for Gwen. As if they knew her better than I did.

I mean, I was just going to buy some chocolates and a Hallmark card. I didn't think such simplistic items required so much thought to be put into them. But apparently, in the words of my younger sister, I had "a lot to learn."

Anyway-so the car issue. I think we all know by now that I am not one of the best drivers out there. As a matter of fact, I'm probably one of the worst-to the point where I should probably get people to sign a waiver before allowing them to get into a car with me. Therefore, as one could imagine, getting behind the wheel of a car with two younger girls in tow was, in my opinion, a lot like embarking on a treacherous journey through the busy streets of L.A. with a pair of bombs sitting in the backseat, waiting for the moment that I would make a stupid mistake so that they could detonate and end all our lives in a catastrophic conflagration of flames.

It was this precise pessimistic thought that was running through my head as I turned sharply out of my neighborhood complex and pressed down on the gas pedal, eliciting a growl from my Volkswagen as its engine revved.

"By the way, Derek," Mel piped up casually, as if the fact that I was practically hyperventilating in the driver's seat while the car jerked from left to right in response to my jittery movements hadn't even fazed her. "You never got to tell me what the hell happened with our deal."

"Deal...?" I muttered distractedly, my twitching eyes repeatedly scanning over the windshield and checking the mirrors because ya never know, someone could go running out into the middle of the street without looking both ways and they could be flailing their arms like a crazy person and you would want to have time to stop before-

"You know," Mel hedged, an irritated edge of impatience in her annoying voice. "The one I threatened you into agreeing with. It involved your lips and a pillow and someone by the name of Scarlett Reynolds-"