Being Queen Bee

Chapter One - I'm Queen Bee!

Chapter One - I'm Queen Bee

Whoever said being popular is easy and a walk in a park is someone who knows nothing about popularity!

Yes, I am Queen Bee! Yep, I'm an 'It girl'. I have an A Grade Popularity Rating now. And yes, all the students at Toby Rodford Senior School, from Years 7 to 11, bow down to me. Uh-huh! I'm a true role model... Being Queen Bee is totally fabulous. Hell yeah! But it's not all what it appears to be. I have to work really hard to maintain my position of power, which involves oozing confidence, bossing kids around; walking, talking and acting like a superstar and pretending I am knowledgeable in anything and everything.

I must confess that most nights I live on Wikipedia to gain most of my acquired knowledge, and I mingle in the right social circles - attending popular kids' birthday parties and going to the cinema, bowling etc with the in crowd - to find out all the latest gossip a Queen Bee needs to know to remain the ruler of her colony.

At school, I am the best student ever - always returning my homework on time, pronouncing the t's at the end of words and rolling my r's. My dazzling blue eyes are constantly open and bright; I have a phony smile plastered on my face all the time like Malibu Barbie! I laugh and flick my lustrous locks like a movie star in class and down the corridors, as if I'm worth a million dollars and am totally interested in what my fans have to say. I have an impeccable fake image. I am amazingly perfect!

Friends! Of course, I've got loads! I gain them on an hourly basis. To be my chum, they have an interview. A two minute chance to prove they're worthy of being associated with me. There is a twenty three per cent success rate amongst Year 9 pupils. Years 10 and 11 are not allowed to be my friends, but merely 'acquaintances', since they're older than me and I couldn't possibly be expected to befriend older kids in the same way I do 13 and 14 year olds.

What I detest the most about being admired is that I have to be combing and styling my barbed wire hair every day, making sure my shiny strawberry blonde tresses falls elegantly onto a pair of fine beautiful shoulders. I resemble a small attractive mannequin in a shop window. Only, I walk, talk and look intelligent. And I wear the Toby Rodford Senior School uniform with pride - blue pleated skirt, crisp white shirt tucked in neatly; black shoes and red tie. My attire is smart and non-creased. Rouge lip gloss shows off the soft superficial glow in my facial expressions.

After school and at the weekend, I enjoy wearing casual clothes and minimal makeup. Whatever I wear, I'm the image of perfection. And I look sensational in the mirror from every angle. Mwah! I'm so gorgeous!

As part of my 'cool girl' status, I am bound by the secret code and I'm forced to become familiar with the 'Popular Kids Manual'. This unique book was created in 1990, by Rachel Holding, the first Queen Bee of Toby Rodford Senior School. Hidden at the back of the library, where all the old dusty books are stored, this special literature (one for girls and a separate one for boys), contains 1,000 important rules about staying at the top of the game at our school. I rarely read the manual. In truth, I've stared at it once, when I happened to see Marnie taking notes from it, as if she was doing real homework!

"Have I got your face or something?" Marnie shouted out loud in the library, as she caught me with my mouth wide open, drooling, mesmerized, bedazzled, by this secret and alluringly soft pink velvet manual.

"No," I replied tersely. "I'm the Queen! Only I have this gorgeous face. And don't you ever forget it!" I quickly released myself from the clutches of the book, moving myself away from Marnie, and, averting my eyes, I pretended I had looked in her direction by sheer coincidence.

Luckily she shrugged the whole incident off, not realising that I, the Queen Bee, had never read this essential guide to staying popular! If she ever discovered the truth, my life as a powerful sovereign would be over!

Vinnie strongly advised me not to take anymore senseless risks - he said I needed to thoroughly read the manual, absorb its contents, taking in all the relevant advice and information. He reminded me that Secondary School is tough. And being Queen Bee, or in his case, King of the Roost, makes things even tougher.

"You have to stay on top," he said to me one day in the school playground, refreshing my stale memory. " You must have the knowledge to reign successfully."

"Ok, I get it!" I answered him sharply, rolling my eyes to heaven. "I'll read the stupid book!"

So I examined the silly manual and made notes. Here are two of the rules that stood out for me:

Rule Number 12:

When doing group work in class or playing in a team sport, for example, hockey in Gym Class, never agree to go in the same group as another popular girl, unless she is your BFF. Two cool girls cannot both grab the attention of the other kids whilst: daintily traversing around the school field as if walking through a bed of tulips, posing on the trampoline like a model, delicately catching a ball with beautiful french tipped manicured nails or trotting around in the gymnasium like a cute adorable Shetland Pony! There is only room for one girl to shine! And that girl better be you, honey! 

(Mental note to self: Is this for real? Seriously? This stuff is making me wanna hurl. It's a total load of bull babble garbage!)

Rule Number 107:

Everybody is your 'friend' even your enemies. Be nice, smile; say hello to the other kids and the teachers (when appropriate). Don't show off too much. It could make you unpopular! Being mean and self-absorbed gets people's backs up and could damage a perfectly healthy reputation.

(Mental note to self: This rule is a load of rubbish! If I can't show off, then I might as well give up my status today and declare myself a geek!)

These rules suck! I choose who I want to do group work with in class and no one is gonna get me to trot like some demented horse round the gym! What the hell is wrong with this Rachel girl? Did she write these rules whilst in a trance? Did she really manage to stay popular using all these ridiculous regulations?

No one has the right to say, 'be nice; nobody is really your enemy'! I hate being nice to everybody! Making conversation with the less than popular children is tolerable (just). But talking to Marnie and Sheryl - OMG! Torture! Speaking to them is more agonising than watching my older brother Taylor memorize his 5 times tables! And trust me, that is pretty agonising!

Marnie and Sheryl have an A2 Popularity Rating, marginally lower than mine. Although, A Grade and A2 Grade are the difference between being Queen Bee and being a normal insignificant bug, with no real power in school! But still, they know the rules. They understand how to play the game well. I'm new to this stuff and learning all the time. I'm not a perfect player of the popularity game. Yet I know how to be Queen Bee! That's the most important thing, in my opinion.

One advantage I have over the A2 Girls is that boys admire me, especially Joe Greshman who used to ignore me! But not anymore Ha! Deal with that, Marnie Yates! Can you handle the fact that the boy you fancy likes me better? Swallow that, Queen Bee Wannabe!

I'm a 'nice girl' (occasionally!). I would never go after Joe just to make Marnie jealous. (Of course, I wouldn't!). Not if she didn't give me a reason to... But I was secretly hoping that she would...