My Big Book O' Johnvris.

Johnvris AU 1- Latte Problem.

AU: "Hey, you're in that one show." - Actor AU (+ Humanstuck AU + Coffee Shop AU).

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"Daydreamer, customer at 3 o'clock!" I snap out of my thoughts and shoot Roxy a thankful look, before turning to face the customer who had just stormed in. I open mouth to greet them, but no sound comes out. The customer is hot. An athletic, if slightly skinny, build. Long, wavy blonde hair- with what has to at least be eight shades of blue faded through it- which is begging for me to run my fingers through it. Flawless, pale skin and blue painted lips that are probably softer than that of the bunny Rose mad. Eyes that are so breathtakingly captivating and so blue that they almost put mine to shame... Is that flecks of gold in them? She isn't model beautiful or cute or adorable, but she is badass and gorgeous and so familiar it hurts, yet I can't put a finger on what I recognize her from. By the time this train of thought has broken, she's scowling at me from across the counter. I immediately wince, before straightening back up- I don't want a goddess like her to be looking at me in that way.

"G-good afternoon." Was that too gentlemanly? And that stutter. I mentally facepalm. Fortunately this mysterious stranger was busy examining the menu. She bites her lip, pearly white against cobalt blue, before her eyes drift down to meet mine. They seem to be more striking than before, if that's possible.

"Should I get a large latte or large hot chocolate, John?" Wait, how does she know my name? Do beautiful people like her know everyone's names just to tease them? I look up at the menu, before looking back at her. And oh gosh, I can't help myself, this is the perfect opportunity. She's going to hate me.

"I'd say a hot chocolate, because drinking too much coffee can cause a latte problems." She stares at me for a second, the sounds of Rose and Roxy's sighs of disappointment sounding behind me, before those blue painted lips curve up and she begins to laugh. It's a laugh that is confident and way way too loud and makes everyone look at her as she's left leaning on the counter, but it fits her so well and I can't help but to join in.

"So, one large hot chocolate?"

"One large hot chocolate."

"One large hot chocolate for...?"

"Vriska." Of course someone like her has a cool name. Why is John so average? Not that I dislike my name, I know Dad put a lot of thought into it, but how can it compare to names like Vriska's? Vriska smiles, before dropping an assortment of coins on the counter and sauntering away to a booth. I stare at her as she props beat up red converse on the table and try to count the coins at the same time. Rose glides over and nudges me.

"John, make her drink. Your current mindset doesn't seem suitable for counting, considering as you look like you've just been shot with an arrow by Cupid and you aren't looking at the coins. Roxy will supervise." I nod, face turning pink, and grab a cup.

Roxy sits on the counter top, earning a mildly disapproving look from Rose.

"Ya know where she's from, right?"

"She seems really familiar, but I have no idea where from!" Roxy laughs and straightens the cup I was holding as I almost miss it while spooning in the cocoa.

"Give her eight marshmallows." She grins and pushes herself off the counter to greet the next customer. Eight marshmallows?

The process of making the hot chocolate passes in a blur as I try to remember where I'd seen her. Why couldn't someone just tell me? I approach the marshmallows and begin to drop them in her drink. All eight of them. At the eighth I pause and look at it. What was so special about the number eight? With a sigh I drop the last one in with a shrug and pick up the drink, then head towards her booth.

She doesn't hear me comig- busy reading a well thumbed book- so I examine her face. Where is she from? As she looks up and catches my eye, it finally strikes home. She was in that series that Rose and Roxy fawned over a few months ago. It was surprisingly awesome- not that I'd told them that. All about wizards and pirates and knights. Vriska was a pirate. The coolest pirate who you may have spent many nights in heated debates with Rose over. I couldn't let Rose badmouth that attractive, smart and self-assured lass! Speaking of Vriska, she takes the hot chocolate from me and takes a long sip, nodding in appreciation.

"Thaaaaaaank you."

"You were in that show, weren't you?" She pauses before she breaks out into a genuine grin and it's beautiful. She looks slightly younger- it softens the sharp edges of her face and exposes those perfect teeth. Not to mention her eyes are basically sparkling and she looks this way because of you.

"Only as the coolest character!" I sigh in relief.

"Phew, I had no idea where I recognized you from. Rose and Roxy were driving me insane by not telling me." She motions for me to sit next to her and chuckles.

"I saw that you were looking annoyed and I didn't think it was because of you turning into putty around me. Which was extremely cute." She winks and takes another sip of her hot chocolate, leaving a stain of that blue lipstick which compliments her eyes so well. I quickly sit down across from her, face flushing brighter.

"Is that not how most people act around someone of your beauty?"

"Only the select few whose attraction is mutually felt, John." There is no winning against her. Before my face begins to resemble a tomato, I decide it's time for a subject change.

"Oh. Um. So how do you know my name?"

"Name tag." Of course it was. Why couldn't my brain act normally around girls as pretty as Vriska? Despite the subject change my face flushes bright red from embarassment. She chugs her hot chocolate and puts down the cup, before standing up. With a small smirk gracing her face, Vriska leans over and tilts my head up. "Aaaaaaaanyway, adorable blush- I'll have to come back tomorrow to see more of it. Hopefully next time we won't be meeting when you're working. And the amount of marshmallows you gave me has been noticed." With that she kisses my cheek and drops a piece of paper in my lap, before sauntering away. The smell of blueberries and chocolate lingers in the air even after she's left and I'm dimly aware of Roxy humming "Can you feel the love tonight". Not that she can say much with her girlfriends giggling away beside her. Or, I guess, hum much.