//synesthesia// a phanficton

Phil's POV

    I smacked myself for laughing as Dan left. I screwed everything up. I guess I was used to being called that, so I laughed it off. Everyone knows I'm gay. It really didn't bother me much anymore. I guess I never thought Dan wasn't gay.

    As he ducked out of the classroom I cringed and my heart dropped. I definitely messed everything up. My happiness shrunk into a small bubble and popped. I felt a deep pit in my stomach and knew what was coming. My depression was seeping in slowly. Great, I thought.

    I quickly got out of the nearly empty classroom and headed to my eighth hour class. The voices were already nagging at me.

    What were you even thinking? Someone as precious as Dan could never consider liking you, not even as a friend.

    Shut up, I can't do this right now.

    Why not? You're just so sensitive to everything. Useless fag.

    You really think that bothers me anymore?

    It should. You're a screw up Phil. You just screw everything up. I know you have your razor...    

    I brushed it off, though it was true. I did have two razors in my book bag. I could just go to the bathroom... I could simply do it. But no, not here. Home. I rushed to my next class and hurried to my seat. Too many people. My breaths were getting harder to come out of my mouth. My eyes felt hot. I buried my head in my arms. I sat for a couple of seconds that way, when I felt a tap on my shoulder. 

    I turned around to see a very concerned, yet blushy Dan. I looked at the floor, embarrassed. "Are you okay Phil?"

    My heart rate sped up as I looked up into his chocolatey brown eyes. They softened at the sight of my face. "I guess," I muttered.

    "Erm, I'm sorry I ran out of the room. I just... I don't know."

    I small smile escaped my lips as Dan grasped the hem of his sweater, blushing profusely. "No worries."

    Dan played with his fringe and looked down at his feet. "Well, I'd better go sit down before the bell rings. See you around," he said, smiling as he walked away.

    Wow, he cared enough to talk to me. My mood shifted a bit. Maybe I wouldn't need my razors today.

Author's note: Okay, this is my first fanfic. I'm sorry it's not that great so far, but I'll try to make it better. Thanks for sticking with me!