Shitposting lol

dOoDlE bOpS ;)

Lmao that's a cover title but hey y'all.

let's talk sexy. as in i'm a curious teenager and have no one to talk about this with and it's awkward but shit I want to get it out okay?

So like... I'm queer, not really attracted to /wieners/ y'know? 

But omg... this is awks.

I want a vibrator? Like okay, I have this vibrating toothbrush and I don't want to tell the story cos it's awkward and I feel bad omg, but let's just say I have this toothbrush. BUT it's really loud so I can't really use it unless I'm home alone and I'm never home alone nowadays (thanks school) and idk, it just doesn't do a lot for me. I feel ashamed about using it (for more than just "masturbation is bad, it's to do with how I got the vibrator, I didn't steal it btw). But y'know I'm a teenager with no income or anything, so I'm not gonna be getting one anytime soon. But like... Idk sexy things. 

I'm kind of curious, like I /guess/ I could see myself doing some ~sexy~ things in the future of like when I'm an older teen, not with penises though because I don't want to be pregnant or y'know... have a thing like /THAT/ up there, it's weird. 

But like... I do want a vibrator one day I guess?? I wish I could one in the more or less near future, but that's gonna happen. Gonna have to wait for it(HAMILTON REFERENCE LMAO). Idk it's weird, liKE I know having sexual thoughts aren't uncommon for my age, but I feel like mine are more advanced? It's not strictly "I wanna lose my virginity" or like "stick in me Todd from the football team" thing, it's like "I want to properly do the weedledo with myself"? idk. I feel like I'm WAY too TMI right now, but y'all I just need to talk about this? Like I feel like girls my age when they think sexual things it isn't immediately "how do I acquire a vibrator hmmm" y'know?

Onto the next thing.

YOunger me was a fucking SCRUB and was also lowkey highkey sexual and I hate myself because of that, but I'm in the facebook group thing and before I knew what a goddaMN FILTER was I would post things... Not like "yo message me for cyber sex" because ew no, but I would post about smut I would've just read or like, once I had this whole thing about being all "how do I get a vibrator underage" and fuck I hate myself for actually posting all that shit, and it was used to insult earlier and idk that just really sucked, I get it, but it sucks. I already feel a lot of shame just day to day, so I feel really shameful about that and then people using to insult me is just ahhhh this is terrible. I just hate younger me and I HATE that I have all these ~sexual~ thoughts. Also don't ask about the ~ thing it just feels a little less awkward when I do it, but it could also easily make it more awkwarD. 

Either way I'm gonna stop before I e m b a r r a s s myself even more smh, sorry if you actually read this.