LATE NIGHT CALLS

accident

11th of January
10:42 am

incoming call:
- do not answer -

"Finally you're answering the phone."

"..."

"Hello? Are you there?"

"Can I say no, I'm not?"

"You can't. At least not today."

"And that's why..?"

"I really need your help."

"Um sure."

"I'm not joking. I really need to know how to stop the bleeding of a wound."

"WHAT HAPPENED?"

"Wow, that's the first time you sound like a sentient being since ever."

"TELL ME. What happened?"

"Okay, well I rode my bicycle and then.."

"Then..?"

"I saw a pretty girl and didn't pay enough attention on bicycling. And then I fell down a slope."

"You expect me to believe such a stupid explanation? Really?"

"Yes, I do. It's urgent so please choose wisely if you let me die or.."

"Let me consider shortly. You're stupid, probably stupid enough to fall down a bike AND a slope. Besides, since our first conversation I know you're this type of guy who..

"There she's again. The edgy but still extremely cute voice."

"Shut up and tell me about the wound. Is it deep?"

"YES. No. I don't know. How am I supposed to know what's deep in your opinion?"

"Try to get up and look if it's really bleeding or if you just.."

"If I just exaggerate? No, I DO NOT. It hurts. Badly. There's some piece of wood stuck in my thigh. And my jeans is already turning bloodily red."

"OKAY. Calm down. Please, calm down."

"Tell me what to do. PLEASE."

"Okay, okay. Do you have a girdle or something like that?"

"Yeah, sure but I don't need a styling tip."

"Idiot. Do you want my help or not?"

"I do! Okay I've got the girdle in my hands. What now?"

"Put it around your thigh above the wound and pull it as tight as you can. That will stop the bleeding."

"..."

"Still there?"

"Yes, it's done."

"Great. Now call someone who can take you to the hospital."

"Okay."

"Is there anything else?"

"No. It's just.."

"Alright, then bye."

- beep beep -

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"..thank you."
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