he had the world; destiel

i dont love you, im just passing the time

castiel

"have sex with me." i pulled his shirt down, bringing him on top of me with a thud. "look, cas i know you're not in the best state of mind-" "just-" i took a breath, my eyes starting to sting again, "please, dean just take the pain away." i egged, wrapping my arms around him again to pull him closer.

he sighed loudly, his hands resting against the sides of my head as he was contemplating the decision. "no, i cant do this to you," he tore my arms off and held them against my chest. "castiel, i told you i don't do shit like this." he talked to me as if i was a child, his voice stern and filled with concern.

"dean, please I'm begging you." i threw my head back and started to feel my ears and cheeks heat up, the tears slipping out one by one as i started to sob under his grip. "please," i repeated over and over again, my emotions not even remotely under control, "please just fuck me," i cried, thick tears sliding down my face and neck.

"dean," i cried harder, my breath starting to turn into short hiccups of pleads for him to do something. "c-castiel, i don't- i cant-" he stuttered out sentences for the first time since i started crying, his grip loosening and hands moving to cup my neck.

"goddammit, i told you not to fall in love, you idiot!" he yelled, lifting me and pulling me into a tight hug, my hands wrapping around him as i cried on his shoulder. "im sorry." i told him, knowing i was making shit worse between us by letting my emotions spill.

i haven't cried in front of dean since.