The entire world seems as if it's melting off its axis, slowly but surely. Everything seems out of place. I feel spears stabbing in the center of my chest, causing a dull numbing pain.
What is happening?
I no longer feel anything. I no longer can pay attention, no matter what is thrown my way. Tyler's rambling that I absolutely devoured just a few days ago are no match to my boredom. Tomorrow Tyler and I visit Ms. Almquist again, and I'm scared. Scratch that, I'm petrified, terrified, if you will. I'm scared of what she will ask and what I will answer, and how my answers will affect Tyler and the way he sees me.
As I continued this constant battle between myself and my own mind, Tyler tapped my shoulder.
"Hey, can I show you something?"
He seemed so nervous, shyness drowned every syllable.
"Y-Yea sure, lead the way." I had no idea why I stuttered, my nervousness spiked and my words walked into each other.
He sat me down on his bed and he turned to his closet, pushing open the door.
With his back turned, he spoke to me, and I made sure to pay attention.
"So when I was, hell probably 15? 16? Two or three years ago, I uh, started to um..." His voice trailed off, as he dug around in the bottom of his floor.
"I uh, played music?" it came out as a question, and I couldn't help but smile to myself.
This cutie plays, too?
"This brings me, er, us to the next point which would be... ah ha!" He snapped, grabbing something hollow-sounding and turned around, energy pulsing through his every movement.
"I wrote you a song."
My entire face started burning, he wrote me a song? Tyler Joseph, bless the boy's soul, wrote a pathetic loser like me a song?
I sat straight up on the edge of his bed, eager to hear anything.
"Bear with me, I've been really quiet, to where you wouldn't hear me practicing" He held a ukulele in his hands, and it had his direct eye contact.
"B-uh, By all means, pl-play it" I smiled, mentally cursing my stuttering.
He nodded at me, and started strumming.
"We don't believe what's on TV
Because it's what we want to see..."
I listened as he strummed, and he sang, and his angelic voice overflowed in my ears and I thought,
If he hadn't saved me, I would never have known there was a ukulele in this boy's room. I would never have heard his beautiful voice. I would never have had him get this clo-
Oh
He's very
very
close.
"If you stick around, I'll sing you pretty sounds and we'll make money selling your hair"
He sat down next to me.
"I don't care what's in your hair, I just wanna know what's on your mind"
His strumming became less frequent.
"I used to say I wanna die before I'm old but-"
My heart was yelling through my ears.
"-because of you I might think twice"
The ukulele was on the bed, forgotten. Tyler was inches away, no centimeters away from my face, and he looked down to my mouth, gently rubbing his fingertips to my cheek.
"M-May I?" he whispered against the side of my face.
I closed my eyes.
I nodded.
His mouth kissed the side of my cheek, and then a little closer to my mouth, and then a little closer, and then a little closer, and then a lit t l e c lo s e r
I turned, and his mouth gently brushed mine, as if he was scared that if he pushed too hard I would crumble into dust.
Our mouths moved in sync, yet both were timid in our actions. His hand had left my cheek long ago, it currently had made its journey to the small of my back, and my hands crept up his chest, making their way to cup the back of his head.
In that moment, we were on fire.
In that moment, I let go.
I let go of my mother, who's actions and words had left permanent marks on my skin.
I let go of my sisters, who fought their way to death.
I let go of my father, who had mistaken love for greed.
I let go of my brother, who missed out on true happiness.
True happiness was this, it was blissfulness. Happiness was the sweet dew of Tyler's chapstick, happiness was the warmth of his breath entering my body, sending shivers down my throat. Happiness was this moment, where I let go. My happiness was him. My happiness is him.
"J-Josh, I love you." He whispered against my lips, which were pulsating from the intensity of Tyler's actions.
"I love you too, Tyler"
Our eyes opened, and I stared.
I stared into his eyes, looking past the reflection of myself, looking past the color of his iris, looking deep into him as a human. A human full of emotion. Tyler was a human that has so many things behind locked bars, and I could see as plain as day he had just given me the key, and I was ready to give him mine.
We were content.
Click!
"Stupid fucking flash!" Zack whispered, and Tyler and I jumped at the sight of his mother and brother behind the crack of the door, both with phones in front of their faces.
Tyler started yelling, and all I could do was laugh. I laughed at the Josephs, what a lovely bunch.
His mom and brother had scampered off, but not until after sending a video and some photos to Tyler, and he sighed.
I placed a hand on his shoulder, dragging it towards the nape of his neck, gently pulling him closer.
Just a little closer.
YOU ARE READING
.YTPME. >>> joshler
FanfictionJosh is depressed. Hell, if I were him I would be too. He slowly but surely fights off his own 'blurryface' with the assistance of the cutie Tyler, who he has only just met. It's got its ups and downs, but honestly, it may possibly end up okay. tw;...
