Haven't You Heard?

Chapter 11: The Struggles of Love

Tuesday, November 21, 1978, Los Angeles, CA

Sitting in my house on the couch watching tv, I decide to tell Prince everything. I grab the remote and mute the tv. "Aww come on, short stacks. Good Times can't be that bad of a show." Prince says with a slight laugh.

"No it's not that. I actually really like this show. It's just that I really need to tell you something that is kind of important and I really don't want to wait on telling you this." I say as I turn to face Prince on the couch.

Prince continues looking at me with a confused look which lets me know that he is listening so I continue. I take a deep breath before spitting out the words that I waited over a month to say. Now this may piss my best friend off. "I forgave Charles. I gave him a second chance. Only one more time is all, please don't get mad." I say, quickly whispering the last part.

I could automatically see Prince's facial expressions form into a confused look. "What do you mean? Please don't say what I think your about to say." Prince asks.

"I mean that Charles and I are back together." I say shyly.

Prince's once confused face is now a mix of an angry face and a disappointed face. "You got to be kidding me. Tell me your kidding." Prince says in a angry voice.

I just look away. I knew that I would have to tell him all of this but maybe I should have waited a bit longer. I don't even want to look and see his reaction. "Your putting yourself back in a position to be hurt. Your being so susceptible and vulnerable and it is really irritating me." Prince says as he gets up off of the couch.

"Why would I purposely want to hurt myself or even irritate you the slightest bit? Listen, peanut. I have this guilty conscience. If I didn't give him at least a second chance, I don't think I could ever live with myself. I have always been given another opportunity to fix things once I have screwed them over the first time. I have given everyone in my life a second chance to do things over except him and that wouldn't be fair, now would it?" I say in a soft tone in hopes to make Prince understand. I know that everything I just said sounds like bs but it's worth a try.

"All of that is crap and you know it." Prince says in an aggravated tone.

"Prince, just listen to me. Hear me out." I say as I try to get his attention back.

"Bullshit. All of that is bullshit and you know it is too." Prince says in the calmest yet the angriest tone possible.

"Why are you even so angry about this anyway?" I ask. Then I realize how stupid that question was. He's my best friend. Why wouldn't he be angry?

"What do you even mean? I know it really isn't my business but the last time you were dating this guy, if I recall correctly, he cheated on you. When that happened, you came crying to me, Patrice. Now I don't mind comforting you but that doesn't mean that I don't mind seeing my best friend constantly hurt. Now if you go back to him this time and the same thing happens to you or possibly even worse than before, what are you going to do then? You know what? Go on and date him if you want to but just know that there won't always be someone around to help you up. Especially if they have already told you how to keep yourself from falling down." Prince says in an annoyed but calm tone.

I feel the tears start to form in my eyes. His words hit me like a ton of bricks. He is very right. I am being very vulnerable and there is a big chance that what happened to me once will happen again. I need to come to a realization that if I go through with this and end up with a broken heart again, I can't go crying back to Prince because he already told me what would happen. Even though he says he would welcome me with open arms and all, I still wouldn't feel right after I had lived through this situation once before. I could avoid all the heartache, heartbreak but my stubbornness won't let me. I don't know if I should continue on with this relationship in hopes of not having a broken heart as the outcome. But if so, I will handle it maturely and on my own.