Chapter 32| You're Not My Oxygen, But I Breathe Your Air

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This fucking story is over a year old

It's not over but we're getting close

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Vic's POV

I impatiently scrubbed myself off in the shower, making sure to get myself as clean as I possibly could. The five days were up and all I wanted was to show him how much he meant to me; how much I needed him in my life. I needed to show him how sorry I was for everything that had happened between us. I needed to show him that he mattered more to me than any stupid powdered substance or liquid drug. I loved Kellin, with all my heart it was true. He just needed to know that.

I rinsed my hair, for what seemed like the 4th time and turned off the faucet. I stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel, drying myself off as best as I could. I wrapped it around my waist and started to do my typical hygiene regiment. I dried and combed my hair, cleaned my nose ring, shaved my face and did all the other "feminine" things almost men wouldn't think about doing to skin. I went in my room and put on my best clothes, tidying up my bed after doing so.

I buttoned up my flannel shirt that Kellin had always borrowed from me and went into the living room. Everything has been cleaned up since the night I went out to see him. Jack and Alex came over, took away all of my substances and helped me clean up. It took a while, but soon my apartment was back the way it had been when Kellin and I were till together. The only significant change being the painting he gave me on my birthday, now being hung up on the living room wall.

I smiled sadly at it, when I suddenly heard a knock at the door, followed by my phone buzzing. I checked the notification to see that it read, "We're here," from Tony. I took in a deep breath and marched over to the door, rolling up my sleeves as I did.

"Here goes everything."

I opened the door to see Kellin standing next to Tony. Tony had agreed to give Kellin a ride here and wait outside incase Kellin needed to live during or after our talk. But in all honesty, I wasn't focused on Tony at all. I was only focused on Kellin.

His hair was slightly matted, like he had tried to take it and gave up half way through. He was wearing the typical black ripped skinny jeans and dark gray sweater, like his inner emo kid was having a field day. I also noticed the bags under his eyes and how still he stood. I had done that to him, drained him of his life force and happiness. I couldn't help but feel selfish trying to get him back in that moment, seeing what pain I had caused him, but I quickly shook those thoughts.

"Are you ready?" I asked, quietly, trying to make eye contact with him, but him trying to avoid it with me.

"Yeah," he said faintly.

"I'll be outside if you guys need me," Tony said awkwardly. He must've felt out of place, seeing that this quarrel had nothing to do with him other than that we were both his friends. Kellin weakly smiled at Tony before stepping in to my apartment and coming over to the couch with me.

We sat down and looked across from each other, almost like we were seeing each other for the first time all over again.

"How are we gonna start this?" He asked, his voice scratchy.

"I-I don't know I have so many thoughts to say... What do you want to know first?" I returned.

"The drugs..."

"Gone. There's no liquor, cocaine or pot in this house. I guarantee," I said, putting my hand up as if I was doing scout's honor.

"Ok... but how do I know if it's gone forever?" He asked.

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