Chapter 12

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I'm afraid of you, afraid of myself and what I'll do, how I lose control.  But I can't help getting ready for you, primping in the mirror and putting on my best dress still secretly hoping you'll call me beautiful again.  When the doorbell rings, my heart skips, but when I open the door, it isn't you. 

It's Lorenzo in black leather, standing in the rain. 

I was hoping I could talk to you, he says.  No expectation, just a moment to sort out what I think happened.

I'm sorry, I say, but I was expecting somebody else.

I can see that, he says, looking me up and down.

For a moment, I see Lorenzo standing there with such presence it seems like the entire world is taking place on my front porch, just between us, and that each drop of rain is is a warm caress from the universe, reminding me why I'm here, why I am alive but before I can say a word, his shoulder is turning toward the road, and he is apologizing for his bad timing.

I've only broken half of the curse, and you must hold the other half because no matter how much I'm drawn to Lorenzo, my tongue is tied, and  all I can do is watch as he rides off into the Oregon rain, and disappear into the dusk.

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