Runnaway Nightmare

13th of September 2009

I was absolutely terrified! I started chewing the gum faster, As if it would save my life, My heart was pounding so hard I could feel it in my ears. I never thought i would be this scared. As the plane began to speed up i knew it was only minutes before it lifted off the ground, Now because the seat next to me was empty i thought about how if i died, i would be alone, No-one to cry with only the joining of the screams amongst everyone else. Is this how its going to be from now on? Stuck only with the company of myself...

That is when the lady in the speaker say something about remaining seated and to make sure our seatbelts are on. I wasn't really listening, I was to busy trying to picture my future, My possibly lonely and miserable future. No! i will not think like that, This is the best thing for me. The plane started to speed up and within seconds we were off the ground. As i looked back at Sydney the lights and view was beautiful, So many bright lights kind of like the night sky, They only difference was that these stars were man made. This was it, No backing out now. This is my new life, Time to forget about my past. As i looked back out the window it reminded me of a carnival with all its bright lights and amazing night life. Who would have guessed something so beautiful and breath taking could cause so much pain... So much of my pain. That's in the past though, Its time to say goodbye. This time i mean it.

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I awoke the same as every morning, Sweat drenched bed sheets, Breathing heavily and shaking but it wasn't so bad any more  Since the doctor gave me sleeping tablets its been getting better... And so have i. As i slowly made my way to the bathroom the silence in my apartment often frightened me, Sometimes it felt like the calm before the storm, Something i hope to never experience  After washing my face i starred into the mirror. I had changed so much since i left Sydney just over a year ago. My long dark brown hair was cut into a short pixie style thanks to my hair dresser trying something new. I had put on some weight since Sydney but it was a good thing, I was no longer dangerously under weight. My face was still as pale but the bags under my eyes were less visible.

Moving here really was my best escape. It was only just going on to 8 Am when someone knocked at my door. I wonder who that is, As soon as i fully opened the door my best friend Maxie  just walked right in before i could even speak. He always acted as if it was his own home, One of his many traits i loved about him. Max had only been my friend for a few months but he had pulled me out of my spiralling depression that i was diagnosed with. Sure i still have depression but with Maxie's happy and down to earth personality, He managed to pull me through most of my worst days. If it wasn't for him i might have actually lost it. When i closed the door and turned around i was amazing at what i saw, Max had changed his hair from brown to brown with blonde streaks, It looked good... Really good. The back was shorter and he had it spiked up, Of course he was still wearing his simple black glasses. He was wearing skinnies with his favourite Mario shirt and a black jacket, and of course he still had his blue skate shoes on.

"Wow" i let the word escape before i could stop myself, He looked at me with one eyebrow raised and his usual half smirk, half smile that a lot of girls went crazy about.

"You like what you see?" He teased.

"Its different but you look good, What happened" I teased back

"HEY! I'm always sexy thank you very much, I decided i need a changed" He began to pretend to be a model but tripped on my books and fell onto the couch.

"Annabell you really need to clean up this death trap you call a home" I couldn't stop myself from laughing and sure enough he was laughing too.

"Maxie what are you doing here" I managed to say after the laughter had stopped.

"You forgot? My my my Annabell your memory is getting worse each week! We are going to Jaycee's play today. Remember? She's playing Snow White." He looked at me with an expression i couldn't work out.

"Omg shit i forgot! She is going to kill me!" I headed straight for my room to find something nice to wear.

"I'd hurry if i was you" Maxie sung from out in the lounge room.

"I know! Oii Max my black dress or blue jeans and my grey shoulder top?"

"Black dress, Then maybe you can get a date for once in your sorry loveless life"

"Shut up! You know dating isn't my thing, plus who would want a partly crazy girlfriend? Now come in here and help me zip up my dress" He walked into the room, looked around and shock his head at me.

"Annabell your not crazy, Messy yes and outgoing at times but not crazy. Besides any guy would be a fool to let you go" After he zipped up my dress his hand lingered at my neck, His finger tips gently brushed the back of it and sent shivers up my spine. When i turned around to look at him i seen something in his eyes but within seconds it was gone.

"Right umm well lets get going now yeah?" He couldn't seem to keep eye contact with me.

"Umm yeah okay, Want me to drive?"

"Sure but don't forget Jaycee's present" He said as he walked to the front door.  What the hell just happened?