Wonder | благоговение | Viktor Nikiforov

| eleven |

The phone shook in your hold, tapping the 'play' button, the music continued undisturbed and flowing as easily, as casually as usual. A yearning - desperation grew within your stomach as you wished you could become nonchalant and uncaring of people or trivial things in your surroundings. The feeling of two pairs of eyes were digging into your figure as you skated upon the ice and your muscles were so tense. Your phone rang with a message, silencing the music temporarily before it continued playing once again.

Your eyes became scrunched shut when you knew it was your father. The whole conversation, the transaction replayed in your mind and it made you disgusted. The only interaction with your father in who knows how many years and he is demanding money.

A hiccup left your mouth making Viktor take a step forward, his eyebrows were furrowed deeply as Yuuri watched you and then him to see his reaction to your terribly off behaviour. Yuuri wasn't sure how to feel. He was worried most of all but beyond that, he was embarrassed as he had only just realised how much he didn't really know you. He was scared as he had no idea who you were speaking to and how they made you flip a switch so suddenly.

He had never seen you cry in all the years he had known you. He felt selfish for believing you were perfectly fine with your life as it was; being a professional figure skater, partially living with him and being with him almost twenty-four seven. Another hiccup made Yuuri stop daydreaming as his teeth were grinding against each other.

He was shocked to see Viktor's back as the Russian man sped along the skirting of the rink to practically dive onto the ice and skate straight towards you. Yuuri's eyes widened tenfold, he had been following Viktor and by the time the man was pulling you into him, had he just noticed the way your back was hunched over, your hands were cupped over your face as your body shook with quiet, deathly quiet sobs.

Almost making contact with the floor, Viktor had grabbed your upper arms to pull you right into the warmth of his body. He tightened his hold around you and petted your hair when you choked on your muffled sobs deep within his torso. A prominent grimace was present on his face, his normally bright, ocean blue eyes were staring at the top of your head, narrowed in mild anger and discontent.

Your knees had given in, forcing Viktor to softly place you on the ice as he was about to lose balance when you had no control over your limbs that clung to Viktor as if he was your life line.

Yuuri's knuckles were turning white against the skirting as he watched his coach and his best friend. He wanted to get to the bottom of this but he was also dying to know if this was also the reason that caused the interruption in your skating career this year. Why this year and what was going through your mind.

His ears perked up at the sound of your voice when you grabbed Viktor's arms, "Let go of me.."

"[Name].."

Despite the rubbed-in tears making your face moist, your face was as impassive as ever. It was as if nothing had happened and it terrified Yuuri gravely.

As if a revelation had come over him, he gasped unintentionally before blushing as he had drawn Viktor's attention towards him before Viktor was looking back at you. He had only just realised how often you made that face and how little emotion he could read upon it. Only just now realising how many burdens, troubles and struggles you could have been carrying on your shoulders by yourself as all you had really cared for was him.

"How troublesome.. I'm going home, I want food." Without making eye contact, you were on your feet as a deeply troubled Viktor watched with arms outstretched towards you in caution.

Panicked, Yuuri was quietly choking on his breath, he was lost and had no idea what to do or how to help you, the walls you had built were way too strong. The separation between internal and eternal problems within you was far to great for Yuuri to even know where to begin. You had been going at this alone for far too long for Yuuri to comprehend and he had most likely missed his chance to help make it at least easier for you.

It was most likely the reason why Yuuri was also another person in the crowd that didn't understand the story, the message that was being conveyed through your skating. Because he wasn't the person your story was completely aimed towards.