Why Twilight SUCKS!

Another persons opinion #4

So I read this on a message board that conveys my thoughts on Edward and his abusive behavior better than I ever could:

When it comes to media influences, we are most concerned with what our heroes do. After all, they are supposed to be the most admirable of people. A villain's actions are assumed to be questionable, but the hero is, well, essentially noble. Why is it, then, that no one seems to be concerned that Edward Cullen, hero of the bestselling books Twilight and New Moon, is an abusive boyfriend? His actions repeatedly demonstrate a dangerous mentality of dependency and control.

The first thing any girl hears in a dating violence discussion is that jealousy is not love. Yet Edward is critically jealous of Jacob Black, one of Bella's family friends. Edward pushes Jacob aside from the end of Twilight where, when Jacob asks Bella if she'd like another dance, Edward answers "I'll take it from here." Perhaps Bella would prefer to dance with Edward – but it's her decision to tell Jacob that, not Edward's. The situation only escalates as Jacob becomes closer to Bella. In a confrontation at the end of New Moon, Bella is genuinely afraid for Jacob's life. Fans of the series might say "Oh, but Jacob is a werewolf – they're historical enemies." Would this excuse an English beau from threatening an Irish friend?

Moreover, in Eclipse, Edward is intent on keeping Bella from associating with Jacob at all. When she says in the first chapter that she's planning on visiting Jacob without Edward if necessary, he says simply "I'll stop you." That is to say, he is willing to use physical force rather than let his girlfriend see one of her closest friends. And it does come to force – to removing a vital part from Bella's truck and bribing Alice to keep Bella under house arrest when he isn't around.

A general dislike of Jacob would be understood. But taking steps to prevent your partner from spending time with someone that you dislike is abuse, plain and simple. And his surprising calm after Bella kisses Jacob seems more indicative to me of a cycle of abuse and reconciliation than any real resolution.

Jealousy is a control tactic. As such, it is often paired with isolation – a technique most familiar in cult dynamics. As soon as Edward and Bella begin dating, Edward criticizes her friends as 'shallow.' Bella soon stops going anywhere with other friends. Not having formed strong bonds before Edward appears on the scene, Bella never bothers to form them at all. The isolation is so complete that when Edward leaves in the beginning of New Moon, Bella spends four or three months in a depressed state before rediscovering her other friends. Yes, it's understandable to want to spend time with your boyfriend. But when you have quite literally no life outside of them – when their absence leaves you so utterly lost – that is unhealthy. And it is wrong of Edward to encourage it. As already demonstrated with Jacob Black, Bella is capable of forming strong friendships when Edward isn't monopolizing her time.

Moreover, a part of this isolation is fully and unarguably intentional. When Edward leaves Bella, he flat-out forbids Alice, Bella's best friend at the time, from seeing her. His motivation? To ensure a "clean break." But it is Bella's right to decide when and how she wants to forget about their relationship. Presuming to dictate her healing process for her is the height of control – it is assuming that you have the right to a person's thoughts.

Abandonment is yet another control tactic. It is emotionally jarring, disruptive, and, if timed properly, can convince the target that their life is less worthwhile without the abuser. I have been the subject of this treatment myself – and, if it were not for my close friends, it would have worked. Thanks to isolation, Bella has no such friends. When Edward resurfaces, she immediately clings to him more desperately than before. He has become her only lifeline.

Of course, Edward resurfaces in that he attempts suicide. I don't care what Romeo and Juliet says: suicide is not romantic. Apart from being mentally unstable, this is characteristic of abusive boyfriends. Many abused women remain with their boyfriends because they believe that they still love each other. They often feel responsible for their boyfriend, who tells them "I can't live without you." For obvious reasons, Bella doesn't want to be responsible for Edward's death. But because of this fear for his life, she stays in a self-destructive relationship.