Empty Eyes

1. A mannequin visits me at night

 Three months ago and she did not feel the taste of chocolate inside her mouth. When you spend your life in an orphanage where feeding depends on how much force you put on your arm when you push other children, people end up telling you things like they did the last time they ate chocolate or anything. But that day his skeletal arms were able to grab a single chocolate cake.

  It was not the best chocolate cake in the world. It had no coverage. It was a rectangular-shaped cake, the kind you buy in the market, and it had more dyes and preservatives than real chocolate. Maybe there was no real chocolate, but that flavoring could make any skinny orphan use his imagination to pretend it was a wonderful cake.

  What was the use of imagination?

  His piece of cake was now in the hands of Gregory, who had a smile of triumph for having pushed a girl with a third of his muscular mace and ripped off the last ounce of happiness. Iris could have grabbed that damn delicious piece of cake, but she had to keep her sunglasses next to her face.

  I could show my eyes to Gregory he thought. Rotten people like him would not be in this world, no one would miss him if he died. She always had thoughts like that when they hurt her - which had become routine among the children at the orphanage and at school. But he gave up his mind, always gave up, good sense ends up talking louder inside some people and becoming non-existent in the minds of others.

  He tried to see if he could get some more cake in the cafeteria, but a pile of orphaned, skinny, hungry cockroaches had eaten up even the crumbs, leaving only the sweet chocolate aroma alive, so they would be able to devour it too. When it comes to hungry children nothing should be wasted Mother Lucia used to say, never been so sure.

  Some employees passed by announcing that it was school time. "Drive to the school bus calmly!" Were the magic words. The cattle burst. Orphans love to stay away from the orphanage. Babies are adopted, the elders flee at night, others get addicted to drugs, and those who do not know the outside world go to school, imagining that their beautiful reign in the orphanage will last forever. But it will not.

  Iris knew that there were only two endings for children who stayed like her could escape and find some way to survive miserably or die on the street with some drug in the syringe in their hands. If they were lucky, very lucky, they could be adopted, but no matter what others say, couples prefer beautiful white-blue babies.

  Iris knew that one day she would have to figure out how she would end up after that orphanage of horrors. During all the years of his life the biggest concern was not to kill anyone else, reaching the end of the day with his dark glasses on his face, but over the years that same doubt returned to his head. Hammering, hammering and hammering. What to do?

  I could run away that night, it seemed like a more interesting idea than picking up at the orphanage, going to school for a few more strokes. Once she tried to speak to Mother Mary about the assaults, all the nun replied was that it was caused by her big mouth, so Iris gave some great suggestions about where the mother could put the bible. She always learned in school that she should reciprocate the favors others give her, so she wanted to be educated by suggesting that the woman put the bible in her anal orifice. Did you do anything wrong to receive those pennants?

  You got that idea out of your head. She was too young to run away. No salesperson would believe that that short, thin girl was of age, could not believe she was over ten. How could I get a job like that? Only a miracle would do that.

  There was still the problem with his eyes, they were quality glasses. He ran away from class to steal them from an angle. He always remembered how good a place it smelled, a mixture of cleanliness and air-conditioning, it was the most chic place where his dirty feet ever touched. Yet she also remembered how frightened she was when running the security guards and promised herself she would never steal. Unless...