Bottle Fairy

Grump

The fairy danced through the air, weaving figures-of-eight around the horns of the troll.

"You're just a grump!" it sang in a voice like bells. "You're just a grump! A silly, old grump!"

The troll swatted at the fairy with a massive, grey hand, but the fairy dodged the blow with ease. "Missed me!" the fairy taunted the troll. "Too slow!"

The troll growled in irritation. "Why don't you just leave me alone?" she asked. "Your light hurts my eyes and you singing hurts my head. Keep this up and I'll crush you."

The fairy dropped down to hover just in front of the troll's face, its wings fluttering almost too fast for the eye to see. "But I can't," it pouted. "You're far too miserable! You need to be happy!"

"Trolls are always miserable."

"And that's what makes you so much fun!" The fairy laughed and started to circle the troll's head once again.

"Enough!" the troll grumbled. "If you won't go, then I will." And, with that, the troll got to her feet, picked up her bundle and began to walk down the path, away from the fairy. The winged figure watched the troll waddle away then fluttered after her.

It didn't take long for the fairy to catch up with its quarry and continue with its self-appointed task of trying to cheer the troll up or - in her victim's opinion - being annoying. The distinction between the two depended very much on the individual concerned. Still, the troll continued on her way, trying to maintain a semblance of dignity despite her unwelcome companion's best efforts. Eventually, still pursued by the fairy, the troll arrived at her dwelling - an underground house, dug into a grassy bank beneath the roots of an ancient tree.

The fairy stopped in mid-air. "Is this where you live? Why do you want to live here? It's so dark and damp and - "

"And it suits me fine," the troll said and went inside, slamming the door behind her.

"Hey! You could invite me in!" the fairy protested, but in vain. The only answer the fairy got was the silence of the woods. "Well," it declared after an interminable moment, "if that's your attitude, I'm going to stay here and wait for you to come out. See if I don't!"

Inside her home, the troll could hear the fairy wittering away in its mindless manner. There was a reason why trolls liked the dark and silent places of the wood. Too much light and too much noise hurt them, and a hurt troll would lash out in pain and anger. Inside her dwelling, the troll could feel the start of a headache that pulsed in time with the fairy's singing. She knew it wouldn't be long before that horrible thing drove her mad. So, the troll began to plot and plan.

Under the tree, the fairy could hear strange noises coming from the troll's house. Intrigued, it tried to find a way into the earthen burrow, but it couldn't. The door was closed, the windows shuttered, and as for the chimney? The fairy recoiled from the black smoke that oozed from the hollow pipe into the dank forest air.

"What are you doing?" the fairy wailed. "Come on you grump! Tell me!"

The front door of the troll's house opened, and the troll herself emerged. She was carrying a cloth-wrapped bundle. "Do you want to see?" the troll asked.

"Yes! Yes I do!" the fairy screamed, dancing around the bundle. "Letmeletmeletmeletme!"

The troll pulled the cloth away to reveal a glass jar about 12" high and 6" across. "It's in here," she said.

Curiosity overcame caution, and the fairy dived into the jar. "There's nothing in here," it complained, then went to fly out again. However, as the fairy turned around in the narrow confines of the jar, its wing brushed against the glass and stuck!

"Hey!" cried the fairy, and put out a hand to free itself. This stuck to the glass. "Hey!" the fairy cried again, and put out a foot. That got stuck too. "Hey! Hey! Grump! I'm stuck!"

The troll fished out a lid from one of her pockets and screwed it down tight onto the jar. "Good," she said, and took the jar back into her house, where she put it on a shelf. "And you'll stay there until I say so," the troll said, and smiled, her face cracking with the effort.

So, at least the fairy had the satisfaction of knowing that it had managed to make the troll happy.