Breaking Inside (VA Fanfic)

Chapter 10

ROSE'S POV

A bright sterile light glared through my eyelids as I lie still on the stiff hospital cot. I could feel my hand being held in a vice-like grip as a soft and firm palm smoothed over my hair, pulling multiple strands from my face.

"Rose?" His thick Russian accent pierced through the silence which soothed my nerves which were building by the second. The brushing of my hair stilled and my hand was squeezed tighter within his sweaty palm.

"Roza?" Reaching out to the voice I pulled myself out of my own mind and slowly cracked my eyes open. I instantly recoiled at the bright glaring light shone down into my sight but slowly opened my eyes once again as a shadow fell over my face.

Glancing up thankfully towards Dimitri I could see the joy build up inside of him to be displayed clearly on his face – masking the pain and sorrow which had previously filled his expression.

"Dimitri?" I asked in my drug filled haze – trying to pull my fluttering mind together into coherent thoughts. He smiled sweetly down at me which made my heart skip a beat before he crushed my lips with his own in what one could only call a desperate kiss. My arms circled around his neck to pull him closer but, as always, his guardian skills came out to play as he quickly unhooked my arms and pulled himself away.

He laughed at my pouting expression before turning back to where he was seated before and sliding back into his chair. Huffing out a sigh I glance around the room and instantly feel a shot of ice cold fear run down my spine as I take in the fact that I was not in my usual bed in the 'ER' but instead I was in a completely separate room with the door shut firmly to seal us in and away from the rest of the infirmary. The machines beside my bed beeped away in accordance to my pulse, heartbeat etc. as others dripped various liquids into my system through a large needle inserted into my wrist.

The machine's beeping began to intensify as I felt my breathing become ragged and uneven. Dimitri, having heard the fast beeping, reached forward quickly to place a familiar clear tube under my nose with the nubbins secured within my nostrils as well as looping the tube in place over my ears. I silently thanked him as the door to my room suddenly burst open bringing in a bustling Dr Olendzki and my mother.

At the sight of Guardian Hathaway Dimitri quickly glanced down at his shoes to avoid her gaze as he rubbed at the back of his neck incessantly.

"Miss Hathaway – how lovely it is to see that you have finally woken up." Dr Olendzki spoke in a soft voice as she came to stand beside Dmitri by my bedside.

My Mother's head shot up in my direction as she heard my name being mentioned before she rushed to the opposite side of my bed to the other two and grabbing my hand into hers.

"Rose…" She sighed my name before placing a small kiss on my hand. Attempting a reassuring smile to my mother, I turned back to the doctor who seemed to be checking over the machines before coming back over to me to check my vitals.

"Rose you are very lucky that Guardian Belikov found you when he did – had he been just a few seconds later... well …" Dr Olendzki trailed off as she scribbled down a few notes onto a purple clipboard which she then placed at the end of my bed.

"How did you find me?" I asked Dimitri in confusion as I searched my memories in a desperate attempt to uncover the truth. Once again his face was covered with a nervous expression which only seemed to worry me more.

"Umm – after you left the meeting I ran after you and with the help of the Dragomir Princess and Mr Ozera I was able to track you to a small wooden cabin on the outskirts of the academy where you were… umm… you were barely conscious…" He spoke softly with a hand cupped around the back of his neck the entire time. I squinted my eyes as I tried to remember what had happened and that was when it all came flooding back in a tidal wave of memories.

"I-I remember…" I whisper barely above a hushed voice.

"I was trying to get away and I- I just wanted some time alone and so I just ran. I didn't care where I was going I just wanted to get away but when I was trying to get through the snow I tripped and my tank got caught behind some roots so I just left it there and kept going."

"I bumped my head and when I got to the cabin I could feel something all over me – it was inside of me, under my skin so I-" I cut myself off as I realised what I had nearly admitted to doing. I had cut myself purposely and there was no way I was going to admit that. Glancing down at my arm I realised there were a number of thick bandages wound around my wrists where the cuts had been.

"Rose what happened in that cabin?" My mother asked in a hushed tone but I just stayed silent as I shook my head in a refusal to answer the question. However, she must have taken my silence as a note of my not remembering so she quickly let it go.

"Now, Miss Hathaway while you were unconscious I had to do a number of tests which I have the results of right here," she held out a stack of papers to me which I took as a sign to take them.

They were pages after pages of technical jargon, numbers and graphs and basically the only thing that made any sense to me was my name.

Glancing up at the doctor I looked at her with a sheepish glance in hopes that she would spare my feelings and help me figure out what the hell it says here.

"Oh, well basically it notes the progress of your lung cancer but it says right here," She points to a table of numbers with a graph beside it, "It says that these cancer cells have actually branched off and into your brain…" She breaks the news as soothing as possible but in all honesty, it didn't really surprise me all that much. I knew, at some stage in the cabin, I knew that something like this was quite possible…

"Now, it can lead to schizophrenia, delusions and depression." She finished as I simply nodded along with what she was saying… I guess the schizophrenia and delusions explain the bugs on my skin and why I cut into my skin to get the cancer out of my body (or really the 'slithering serpent'.)