2:30 AM, Friday June 12, 2006.
I woke up with a fright, not really understanding why. It gave me the chills just thinking about it. I realized that my husband wasn't in the bed tonight for the third time this week. I have my suspicions, but I keep them to myself. I look at the clock on the night stand by my bed, oh great, 2:30 am. I push the covers off me and swing my legs to the floor and got out of bed. I make my way to the kitchen and made myself some warm milk to relax. A few minutes later Ryan walks in, notices me and asks "You're still up? I thought you'd be asleep by now."
"Oh I was asleep but I woke up to find your side of the bed empty. Where were you? This is the third time this week Ryan! What's so important that you can't be home at a reasonable time and not having me worrying if you're hurt or worse killed." My southern accent coming out a little.
"I'm Sorry babe, I am." He tries to say convincing, but fails.
"Sorry won't cut it. I want the husband i fell for all those years ago back. We've been together for four years married for six yet you push me away at night." I respond slightly upset.
"Well, i have to run a business and it requires me to stay late some nights. I want to make sure we are well supported and any kids we have in the future."
"Yeah right! I already know that you've been sleeping with that whore of a receptionist. But really though... Her of all people to make your mistress? Really? Were you that desperate? I mean i know things have been strained since i miscarried two months ago but still." I respond. He was clearly lost of words because he thought that i didn't know. It's like, "Bitch please! I have my resources. The fuck outta here!"
Finally he says slightly enraged "I don't know who told you that, but who ever said that is lying. It's slander! You don't actually believe that?"
"It'd honestly explain alot for the past couple months." I reply reasonably.
We stand there in silence for awhile. He doesn't realize he hurt me and everything. Ever since the loss of our child, he has changed, and not for the good. We head upstairs, he sleeps in the guest bedroom and i sleep in ours. Where did it go wrong? Where did I go wrong?
_______
.... To be continued...
Men Right? Lol cx jk
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The Loyal and the Unloyal!
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