Hotarubi no Mori e Afterstory (ONCE AGAIN)

THE END IS JUST THE BEGINNING

I am really encouraging you to watch the movie first because this story is a literal continuation of the movie. You will get what I mean when you've read this chapter.

*****

The End Is Just A Beginning.

"I love you."

Gin's last words before he vanished in my arms.

"I love you, too."

I replied as I am sobbing and hugging Gin's yukata at my arms. I love him. I love Gin. But it was all too late for the both of us.

I wonder if he heard my response to him?

That was our last conversation that night. The moon shines brightly in the night sky, the fireflies dance in the dark sides of the forest, the humid breeze that night, and the smell of burning woods from the summer festival of the youkai's.

My last festival for this year and my last summer with him.

Deep green. that is the mountain god's forest. Slowly, the fireflies lights up that forest and as I pick up the last thing Gin entrusted to me, his mask, one by one the youkai's on that night appeared before me.

'Youkai.' I am not fascinated by them right now. They are in front of me with their real faces but I am not excited at all, not like before. Maybe because I matured, or maybe because my mind is full of things and memories of Gin. All I know is that it hurts. My chest hurts.

"Hotaru. Thank you." One youkai said to me with sadness on his voice.

"We wanted to be with Gin forever, but ...." says another one.

"Gin wanted to touch a human." continued by the another.

I know in myself that they are more hurt than me. They have been with Gin for far more longer than me, they cared for him, they cherished him, they treat him like one of them, and they truly loved him and protected him from humans like me. I witnessed that many times already.

"He finally got to be hugged by a human."

Yes. I finally got to touch Gin. I finally got the chance to hug him for the first and last time. and because of that, I cried for a long time because of happiness and loneliness at the same time.

I just smiled to the youkais of the forest of the mountain god. And as the fireflies lights up my path, I waved my last greeting to them, my goodbye.

I continue to walk on the path where the fireflies lights for me, they guided me out of the forest in Gin's place. As I hug Gin's mask, I uttered my thank you for all the spirits of that forest.

Even though Gin is gone, they still guided me out of the forest safely, just like how Gin always did to me.

Another tear fell from my eyes as a thought of Gin not seeing me out of the forest again slips to my mind. An image of the empty forest entrance where we had always meet every summer, every day. An image of the beautiful forest, river, and flower bed without Gin around anymore. An image of the pathway where Gin isn't by my side walking alongside with me talking and laughing with me and teasing me of how time quickly flies.

I probably won't be able to look forward to the next summer to come for a long time.

My chest hurts.

My tears are still overflowing. but this warmth in my hands and these summer memories will live on in my heart.

As I looked back for the last time that night, I can still see Gin's image standing on the side of the forest entrance and waving his hand and saying that he'll wait again for me next year.

I know now. I know for sure why my chest hurts this much.

Gin, the one that I lost that night, I loved him since the summer of my sixth year. He's my first love and I regretted those years that I didn't realize what Gin is for me.

I love him.

*****

told ya'.

My version of Hotarubi no Mori e is one that probably wants you to watch the movie again and again for a look back.