playing with the air // m.h.

you hope that that boy will be alright

m a t t y // p o v

It kept repeating in my head, her apology for something neither of us did.

I'm sorry I ran out after we fucked.

She said it in such a blunt way it makes me curious how much she's been pondering this. I wanted to explain to her what really happened, that she just crashed in George and I's bed, and we took the living room, but even since we came back down to the party, its like she has an impenetrable bubble around her, every time I get close enough to talk to her, she disappears. I don't know if I just lose her in the crowd, or if she deliberately walks off, but I was beginning to get tired of it.

"I was worried you wouldn't have a good time," George commented on my slight scowl.

"Its not the party's fault," I sigh, drinking a bit more wine. Honestly if I wasn't going to resolve this situation, I might as well get hammered.

"Well, since you're in such a good mood, I was meaning to discuss something with you." George and I now took up a quieter corner in the room, mingled around Adam and a few others, but not necessarily involved in their conversation.

I hum a reply, asking him to go on, as I had a mouthful of alcohol.

" I've been checking out retail in the city, thinking we could set up a base in London," he says very casually.

"Of course, whatever you pick I'll sign off on, the band's finally making enough money we can keep an apartment while touring," I agree immediately, I'd trust George with my life to be frank, even though I had a few jealous moments regarding Destry and him. Speaking of Destry, my eyes wouldn't move from the back of her head, waiting for a break in conversations so I could try my luck again.

"Awesome, because I found this place—"

"Pause that mate, got to run," I held I hand up to assure him I'd resume the conversation soon, but she was beginning to wander again, and considering it was past two in the morning, I had a feeling this would be one of my last chances. It took a second for me to realize she was genuinely ignoring my call outs to her, not just unable to hear me.

"Destry!" I call one final time, enclosing my fingers around possibly the daintiest wrist I've ever held. Annoyingly enough it causes my heart to jump for a moment, butterflies ensuing when she finally turns to look at me. "Destry," I almost breathe out her name, nerves suddenly flooding me. Come on, Healy, it hasn't been that much of a dry spell. "Can we talk?"

Her expression could only be described as flat, her lips even formed into a straight line as she nodded. I hope that she doesn't notice my sigh of relief, but knowing how she is I was probably caught red-handed. She leads me towards a slightly calmer space beside the window, its only when she lights a blunt do I realize that is was really for herself and not the integrity of the conversation.

"Your apology is wrong," I finally sputter out. She quirks an eyebrow at me, and I watch her expression melt away, ready for an argument. Shit, why don't I just put both feet in my mouth. "nonononono," I interrupt her opening her mouth to speak with frantic noises that were meant to create reassurance, yeah right. "That sounds rude, but its not what I meant. We didn't sleep together, Destry. You were wasted and Asher had other arrangements, George and I just let you have our bed." I'm nearly panting, having struggled to get everything out before she could run away.

Slowly her face morphed to ponder. "So, the clothes?"

"Our suitcases were in there, we've been staying there for a bit now." I feel my brows furrow, a desperate mess to convince her I'm not nearly as bad as she's thought. I noticed something in her eyes for a moment; remorse? Disappointment? "Don't get me wrong, I—"