blue | joshler

♥ øne ♥

trigger warning: this story contains the mention of self harm, depression, abused,
sexual assault, homophobia, health issues and offensive language. don't read if easily triggered, thanks. stay safe and enjoy the story.

;

blue.

it was tyler's favorite color. but it wasn't just a color. it was an emotion. it was a describing word. people didn't understand what blue specifically meant, but tyler did.

"how you feeling?"
"blue"
"sad?"
"no, blue."
she shook her head, like she always did.
"tyler i told you, blue isn't a feeling"
she never understood tyler. like everyone else she believed blue couldn't be more than a color.

she planted a kiss on her son's forehead and left the room in complete silence. he wrapped himself in his white and blue hoodie and started writing in his notebook, like he did every night after his mom confronted him.

he never wrote anything specific. sometimes he didn't even write words. he just scribbled away in that light orange notebook.

tomorrow was friday. tyler liked fridays. but this friday in particular was dreadful. in band class there is going to be a project, you and a partner will create a song and rhythm and preform for the class. the project wasn't the worst part, even though he's never touched an instrument or wrote a single song. it was who he'd be partnered with. tyler isolated himself from almost everyone really. mostly because nobody understood him except himself.

tyler slid the notebook under his bed and laid down. he started at the ceiling for a moment and soon drifted to sleep.