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Hey warning, it might be a little annoying to read but, please bear with it..

I have this crush. He already was my bestfriend. Idk I really cant stand a day without talking to him. He was one of the reasons why I wanna go to school practice afterschool, and hang out with friends.

I really thought i could trust messenger, i could trust those secret conversations. But they were nothing. I just wished i said all of those in real life, instead of just ruining our friendship.

Wanna know what happened? Well then, sit back and just read this.
If not, you can go thru my next chapter.

We have this practice for a play. We practice every afterschool /except first and last day of the week/ But this past Thursday, It was announced that we wont have classes for Friday/last day of the week/ We were cramming for play, we needed friday to finish our preparations.

My crush and I needed to go to that practice we are going to do on friday. I didnt expect things would turn out bad.

You see, Crush's mom is strict. So his mom was angry about the practice were going to have. That he was going out too much. We had no choice but to continue it without him, turns out eventually, it was cancelled.

It really didnt make me feel sad that it was cancelled. It made me feel sad because, we was refrained from doing anything. Is that a glad news? Ithought about it. And realized.

He wasnt even allowed to go to school anymore.

Really, it was sad, But I didnt believe it. Until next week comes.

It took 2-3 days, before he could even reply. I couldnt bear to look at messenger, without him chatting me. If it was a regular day he would be talking to me until we fall asleep. But it was different. I cant stand it.

He told our friends everything in our Squad Group Chat. His mom told him to leave our section group chat. Why? Because we were BAD INFLUENCE to him. It hit me hard.

The next message he sent was that I was the worst one, out of all the squad members *according to his mom*. I wanted to cry, of course. But i didnt. I kept it.

His mom saw all our messages to each other, including our secret conversation, during those times we were chatting, I felt happy. But, why am I a BAD INFLUENCE?! I dont get it. I care for him, I even tried to make him smile everytime his mood is really bad, why did I become a bad influence to him?

Oh. Good thing I was only backreading those messages he sent to the group /I wasn't active wen he told the squad chat about it/ . It might have gotten worse if I was lol

I was the only one who was affected by it the most in our squad. Because they didnt actually care about me when Crush said that I was the worst of the bad influencers.

I only trusted one friend that time, so I talked to her.

She knew what i felt, she comforted me. But she asked me something..

"Are you going to stop talking to him or no?"

I didnt know the answer. I, then, cried. I really regret going near him and being close with him. I regret it..

If i could only be a perfect person and everyone looks and thinks of me like a good person. Then everything would have been fine. If I stopped commiting sins and stopped doing things that make me look like a jerk, everything would have been fine.

But, no. Now I have to stop everything.

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