All I wanted was peace

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Kellins P.O.V
Trigger warning ///
I looked in the mirror and all I see is disgusting me
oh look there a bruise
forming and a bunch of cuts wow I'm a complete fu*k up just as Dad would say

"You a Fu*king worthless peace of shit fu*king fa*"

(I hate that word)

  words to live by that was my real Dad's last words before he left

After my mother left,
I was left with a abusive step father every single night he would beat me to the point I couldn't stand
I was in to much pain I was never good enough he would blame me for my mom leaving,
my sister died from sucide so I really have no one my other family are across the world so I pretty much have no one all
my friends disowned me when they found out I was gay

I really can't take it anymore the voices are getting louder
I can't win

I go to my bathroom and take the sleeping pills and the biggest razor blade I have and swallow the pills and watch all the blood ooze out I then start to get dizzy

Then I hear someone scream and say
"Oh my god my baby"
"Mommy?"
I said I haven't seen her or heard of her in years
"Yes sweetie the ambulance is coming soon just stay awake for me"
I heard her sob
"B-but dad"
I whimpered
"He's got in to a car crash, I'm so sorry for leaving you baby"
My eyes where starting to close
"Oh thank god there here"
Then I feel someone carrying me and that's when I black out

Fast forward to the hospital

"I'm sorry to tell you that you son has been self-harming and he swallowed about 25 pills we had to pump his stomach and has 2 broken rids
... Do you know if he was abused recently"
"Um no I had to leave for five years"
"Oh who was taking care of him?"
"Uh his father"
"Um you know we have to ask him ques-
He was intrupted
"Uh he got in a car accident
H-he's dead"
"Oh I'm sorry, but we have to put him on suicide watch and he has to be signed to a mental hospital"
Wow that was blunt
"Oh will it help my baby"
My mom sobbed
"Yes it won't take one day there one on one therapy and group therapy 2 times a day and lots of supervision
Its the best in Michigan"
"O-ok"
"Ok good he's awake"
They looked at me
"So Kellin your going to be on suicide watch for 72 hours
(A/n in Canada it's 72 hours)
And you're signed to a mental hospital"
I didn't say anything I was was kinda upset I just wanted to die why would my mom come know of all the times
"Ok"
"Honey why"
"Why do you think, dad every night beats me, kids at school I lost all my friends because I'm gay, and I get bullied for it I get physically abused and mentally abused and verbally abused and the voice i can't win and with you gone"
I then turn in to a huge sobbing mess
"You left me!!*
My breathing starts to get laboured oh no
"Kells just breathe with me
In she inhales
Out she exhales"
I copy what she's doing its takes a few moments
The my breathing slowly comes back and when my breathing is balanced
She hugs me we hug for about 5 mins until my mom says
"Hey you know I love you"
"I love you to"
I mumbled my eyes starting to get heavy
"Now get some sleep I'll be right by your side"
She said

(Idk 72 hours Skip I'm sorry I'm so DANM lazy, how are you today)

C'mon Kellin lets get your clothes and git gats from home

*Time Skip to the drive to the hospital I'm professionally lazy what can I say*★

"Honey were here"
My mom said
I look up and in huge writing

Hospital for broken souls

Oh dear

I really hope you find this a little enjoyable please comment if you like this I'm going to put
Band members in here
So tell me what bands
And with that I
Gotta blast

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