CHOCOLATE MILKSHAKE ☞ Y. MIN

step 8: blend all ingredients

i had taken one lick at my vanilla ice cream until jungkook shoved me out the door. he pushed me onto the edge of the curb, my tips of my shoes barely above the ledge. 

"what, jungkook? what is it?"

when i tried turning around to talk to him, he spun me back the other way. though it was quite windy out, jungkook was sweating and i could see the small beads sliding down the sides of his temple. 

"yah, stop it! what are you doing?"  

he was frantically trying to shove me into his car. but i stepped down the curb, my ice cream hovering dangerously close to his car's sleek, black hood.

"what's the rush, jungkook? you bring me out for ice cream and now you're-"

then i saw what he were trying to hide from me. i met his eyes, mine holding question, his holding something unreadable. yet i could see pure terror and guilt piercing through them. 

he gulped and he shifted so i didn't have to look through the window. 

i saw you sitting on a booth, across from seokjin, smiling happily. at the very back of the parlor, i could see the back of the strawberry boy, his broad shoulders hiding almost three-fourths of your entire figure. 

you shared an ice cream with him. you two shared strawberry ice cream together. 

you never shared ice cream with me before, hyung. you'd always ask for a separate spoon and cup to scoop my share. 

you always told me you were germophobic. you always told me that we shouldn't share saliva because it could transfer germs. am i that disgusting to you? is seokjin the only exception because he's seokjin? are your co-workers suddenly cleaner than your best friend? 

"my co-worker introduced me to this place so i could try their strawberry soft serve."

so it was seokjin. i get why you chose him over me.

someone you've met only four months into your new job was more important, more worthy of your time than someone whom you've known for twelve years. yes, i completely get why. 

"i'm sorry, jimin. i didn't want you to see-"

"yeah. i know."

too many people have apologized to me. first, you said you were sorry just because you missed one friendiversary. but it was me who should've been apologizing. i overreacted. so what if you miss one friendiversary? it won't matter in the long run to you anyways and it looks like you could care less.

then jungkook apologized for not being able to protect me from you. but it should've been me. i should've apologized to the boy, knowing myself and knowing how pathetically weak i am for you. 

finally, i apologized to myself. for falling in love with you. for being so easygoing and so submissive, so blind, so oblivious, to the fact that you only saw me as a friend. nothing more, but everything less.