Angels {Brendon Urie/Panic! At The Disco} -COMPLETED-

Relentless

I stayed in my rooms for the rest of the night. I couldn’t even begin to think about what Brendon had said to me. I knew he was just being ridiculous, trying to get me to stay and all, but it really didn’t help. Ian was the last person that told me he loved me, and it felt wrong to hear it from anybody else, especially Brendon.

It took me a while to actually start making any progress towards packing my things. I could still hear Brendon. He was still sat on the floor, leant against my door. I heard the occasional bleep of a game and a curse under his breath every time he lost a life. Eventually, he sighed and left, knowing that I wasn’t going to come out anytime soon.

After around 4 hours of continuous packing, everything in mine and Ian’s room was packed away. I’d kept a few of Ian’s clothes, but the others were packed up for charity. All that was left was my outfit for the morning and a stripped duvet and bed sheets. I eventually grew tired and fell to sleep.

--

The next morning, I awoke at 6AM. I showered and dressed in just half an hour. I really needed to get away.

I walked downstairs with my suitcase and found Brendon sat on the sofa, a worried expression on his face.

‘’Let me help you with your stuff’’ he jumped up and ran past me up the stairs. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion and dumped my bags down.

I wandered into the kitchen and made myself some cereal. There was already a bowl in the sink so I presumed that Brendon had already ate. I poured myself some juice and sat down to relax. My flight was in four hours, I had two to get to the airport which left me some time to check everything.

‘’Thanks’’. I said, as Brendon entered the kitchen. He didn’t make eye contact with me, he just turned on the kettle.

‘’Coffee?’’ He asked, looking away.

‘’I’m good, thanks’’ I replied, munching away quietly at my cereal.

Brendon continued to make his drink before sitting down opposite me. He grabbed a magazine and began to flick through it, still not looking up at me.

‘’You need a ride to the airport?’’

‘’Uh, yeah, if you wouldn’t mind’’. I nodded, although he didn’t see.

‘’Sure, it’s no problem’’.

--

We soon arrived at LAX and Brendon grabbed my suitcase from the boot. I thanked him and grabbed my own bag. He locked the car and began to wheel my case towards the entrance for me. I didn’t question him, I just followed. Taking a long walk down past all the check in desks, I began to realise that I was actually leaving, and I wasn’t planning on coming back. I’d thought about it so many times after Ian’s passing, but now it was finally happening. I didn’t know if I was happy or sad.

Brendon stood beside me as I checked in. The woman at the desk kept giving him odd glances. She checked my passport and frowned.

‘’Aren’t you Ian’s wife?’’ she asked.

I gulped and for the first time in 12 hours, Brendon looked directly at me. I felt a rush inside and bit my lip, nodding. I didn’t trust my voice, and frankly, I didn’t want to answer anymore of her awkward upcoming questions.

We quickly left as headed up towards security checks. This was as far as non-passengers could go. I stood at the doors, tapping my foot on the ground awkwardly. Brendon licked his lips and looked down, chuckling to himself. I stared at him, he shook his head.

‘’Brendon what is it?’’

He shook his head again and took off his sunglasses, tucking them into his jeans pocket.

‘’It’s…Would it be crazy if I asked you…just, why?’’ He looked at me, and I looked back.

‘’I don’t know’’ I answered, not moving at all.

‘’What about everything you have, Nat? What about your family, Ian’s family, Dallon, Ryan, John, Spencer, me…what am I supposed to do now?’’

‘’Go back to how you were before’’.

Brendon stepped closer to me. He looked me dead in the eyes. I felt his hand come up and caress my cheek, his forehead resting on my own. I tensed up inside.

‘’But what if I don’t want to?’’

I quickly pulled away from him, grabbed my bags and walked as fast as I could through the gates of security, not looking back.

*I updated yay. Sorry for the s u p e r long delay, I hope you liked this chapter:) 

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